Learning to Love
by Izzy Yuki Hime
Summary: AU. Sequel to 'An Anomaly'. Rachel and Puck begin a relationship but will it succeed in the face of adversity?
1. Difficulties

**A/N: **Right, well here's the first chapter of the sequel to 'An Anomaly'. I was a bit unsure what direction I was taking it, hence the slower update. Anyway, I hope you like it.

**N.B.** From here, the plot completely deviates from Glee's actual storyline, minus a few things which will be revealed. It's also going to be shorter in chapter number, although roughly the same word count as AA. Also, I'll try to post chapter 2 by Sunday, but after that, updates will be Wednesdays and Fridays. Sorry, but life is catching up with me and I've got a busy month ahead of me. Also, there's going to be a lot more singing/

Songs featured are: 'Whataya Want From Me?' by Adam Lambert, and 'Tonque Tied' by Faber Drive.

Big thank yous to everyone who reviewed/subscribed/favourited Chapter 8 of AA. I'm mentioning you here instead :)

**Reviewers: **miladybronwyn,** twighlightangel61090, **Karma22,** sparklylulz,** piper-h-99,** melon872, **Vivilou,** Maiqu, **Shelz,** sweetcaroline1986, **FREAKTONIGHT,** Recco101 **and**RedMagic**

**Subscribers: **PKteach,** Speezy83, **better than **and **RedMagic

**Favouriters:** sparklylulz,** Maiqu **and** Princ3ss St3phii **

Disclaimer: _I do not own Glee or any of the characters in it._ Also, when Puck talks about 'it was a gay guy's song, so it was probably about some other dude', no homophobia is intended. I support the rights of people to love whoever they want regardless of gender, age, religion or race.

**I hope you like it!**

* * *

**Whataya want from me?**

It had been exactly a week since they'd started going out, and Noah Puckerman was beginning to realise that maybe he'd got himself in for more than he'd expected. He also realised that although Rachel was crazy, he hadn't seen exactly _how_ crazy she was. Seriously. The girl made Wednesday Addams look like your average, run-of-the-mill American kid.

It wasn't just the daily myspace updates (at least she was talented enough to justify that, even if the idea that she had fans _was_ a little mental), or the insane exercise routine she did each day, or the crazy diet she suddenly started in preparation for Regionals. And he didn't really mind the little gold stars she put by her name (hey, it was kinda cute ok?) or the fact that was immensely bossy all the time, and _especially_ at Glee Club (total turn on, if he was honest). But her completely obsessive need to be the best, her constant pushing herself to be better and her strange moments of being a diva had somehow taken on a prominence that he hadn't seen previously. He didn't understand it, he didn't like it, and he wanted it to stop. But he also completely did _not _have the balls to tell her to her face. So he spoke to Quinn.

'Puck, look, it's probably just the fact that it's a new relationship. Come on. Don't you remember feeling this way about Santana or whoever it was before that? You have that weird first couple of weeks, and then you kind of get used to it, and then it's all fine.' The blonde looked at him piercingly. 'You're the one who liked her enough to get up and sing at her _again_ and to actually mean it this time. And you're the one who looked out for her all that time with Finn. _And_ you haven't had sex in what, three months because of her? That's got to stand for something right? Surely you don't want to throw that all away because she's being a little demanding and stroppy.' Puck rubbed his mohawk awkwardly, pinching the bridge of his nose and looked stressed.

'Yeah I know Q, I know ok? It's just...she didn't used to be like this I _swear_. And I did not sign up for this. She's actually driving me crazy.' Quinn looked at him, eyebrows raised.

'She drives everyone crazy. You should know that by now.' She patted his arm comfortingly. 'Look, it'll be ok, you'll see. Just give it a few days and it'll all be fine, honestly.' She stood up slowly. 'I have to go find Jesse now, but text me if you're panicking ok?' She walked away, and he watched her go, thinking _I sure as hell hope you're right._

_

* * *

_

Meanwhile, Rachel was in a state of total panic. She sat on her bed, then got up, pacing around the room anxiously until Kurt gripped her arm firmly and sat her down again, wedging her firmly between himself and Mercedes.

'What am I _doing_ Kurt?' she wailed. 'Seriously, I start going out with the guy I've liked for ages, and suddenly I start becoming this insane, obsessive crazy person. What's happened to me? Do you think I'm ill?' She would have continued, had Mercedes not clamped a palm over her mouth, forcing her to shut up.

'Well for starters honey, you need to _calm down_. You're not going to help yourself by going all psycho.' She paused. 'Well, any _more _psycho than you already are. Honestly girl, what is _with _you lately? It's like the old you but _worse_.' Kurt nodded in agreement.

'Your actions are certainly not like those you've been displaying lately. With Puckerman you seemed to relax and actually become a little more...human', he said briskly. 'And now it's like you're a six-year-old who's been given more candy than they've eaten in a year all in one go. You're acting completely out of character to how you were prior to your relationship with Puck. And it's not a good look for you.' Mercedes shook her head, murmuring her assent. 'Rachel, we really need to sort you out. Because this isn't going to do you any favours, and it won't make things with lover boy any easier', Kurt said with an air of decisiveness. 'Do you know why you're acting this way?' Rachel sat on the bed, thinking for a few minutes. Then she spoke.

'I know this will sound really stupid and illogical, but I think I'm nervous.' The other two looked at her questioningly. 'Well, the thing is, before we started going out, I didn't have to think about how I was acting. I was just me and he was just...Noah.' She sighed. 'I knew he liked me for who I was, so I could just be me. And I knew I didn't have to be some star to impress him. I could relax, because I knew he would look out for me no matter what.' She sighed again. 'But now we're actually _together_ it's like I feel like I have to impress him. I have to be something better, brighter; bigger. I have to be a star. I have to be this diva. And then I get all demanding and crazy because I'm so worried I'm doing it wrong and he won't like me and then all this will be for nothing.' Her voice got slightly hysterical and she came to a halt. Again, the pair shared a look.

'Honey that has to be the biggest load of bullshit I have _ever _heard', Mercedes said impatiently. 'Since when did going out with someone mean you have to be something different?' Kurt nodded.

'My girl's right', he said with a small smile. 'He liked you enough to go out with you as you were. What makes you think it's going to be any different now?' He sighed, lifting Rachel's face so he could look her in the eye. 'You, Rachel Berry, are one crazy, irritating, loud mouthed diva. But you're not _this_ psycho star ok? You're just you. And you have to realise that Puck likes you as that person. You don't _have_ to impress him. You just need to be the person he wanted to go out with.' He and Mercedes seized her in an impromptu hug. 'Come on. They have a sale on in town. I think we should have some retail therapy.' He jumped up, and grabbed their hands, dragging the two girls giggling out of the door.

* * *

The next day, despite Rachel's best intentions, things did not go well. In fact, events conspired against her and the day was really...crap.

It all started when she walked up to Noah at his locker at lunchtime. She could tell something was wrong by the slightly tight smile on his face and the tension in his body. But she gave him a kiss, sliding into his arms and getting the usual feeling of belonging that sent little shivers down her spine every time.

'So are you still coming over tonight?' she asked, eyes on his face, trying to figure out what was wrong.

'I'm sorry Rach, I'm going out with the guys', he said, with an awkward shrug. 'Wait, 'still' coming over?' Rachel crossed her arms over her chest, trying to ignore the prickling sensation in the back of her eyes.

'We had plans Noah. Remember?' He shook his head. 'Well you know, seeing as we're together now we were going to spend an evening together. Like a special evening together. But I guess if you're going out the _guys_ I'll just have to see you another evening. It's not like I had anything prepared or anything.' She couldn't quite keep the sharp sarcasm out of her voice, and he twitched like he'd been stung. He shifted, his posture angry, looming over her.

'Well I'm sorry that I _forgot_ Rachel. Maybe you should make me one of those crazy-ass cat calendars you made Finn. So we could synchronise our entire lives around each other.' He shot her a glare. 'Wait, no, sorry, around _you_. Cause it's not me that's the crazy diva here _babe_, it's you!' He shook his head. 'I don't know what's got into you lately, but you've been acting insane. And I don't like it.' He paused, rubbing his mohawk, a sure sign he was unsettled. 'Look Rach, you know I like you and I want this to work out between us. But I just don't see how it can when all you've done this week is be some egotistical mental bitch.' Rachel flinched as if he'd hit her. Inside, she was more hurt than she could say. _He's been spending time with me for weeks and then he turns around and says_ this_? _She wondered. _Does he even realise how much it would hurt me? _Her eyes prickled again, and she knew she was going to cry.

'Well maybe I should give you some time to work out if this is really what you want Noah', she said slowly. 'So go and have your evening with the guys. And when you've figured out if you can cope with me being a 'mental bitch' or not, let me know ok?' She turned and walked away, managing to reach the girl's bathroom before she broke down, texting Quinn for some assistance.

* * *

Puck stood looking after her long after she'd gone from view, wondering if he'd just fucked up. Again. Rubbing his eyes tiredly, he went to eat, wondering what he could possibly have done.

* * *

That afternoon, he went to the practice room where Glee was held, knowing it would be empty. Picking up one of the guitars there, he tuned it for a minute, then began to play.

_Hey, slow it down__  
__What do you want from me?__  
__What do you want from me?__  
__Yeah, I'm afraid__  
__What do you want from me?__  
__What do you from me?__  
_

He knew it was a gay guy's song, so it was probably about some other dude, but he figured the lyrics were open enough to say what he was feeling. Which right now, was pretty fucking confused.

_There might have been a time__  
__I would give myself away__  
__Oh once upon a time__  
__I didn't give a damn__  
__But now here we are__  
__So what do you want from me?__  
__What do you want from me?_

But the thing was, even though he knew he didn't understand what was going on right now, he did know Rachel had changed him. And sure, this massive hissy she was throwing was screwing with his head, but that didn't mean he didn't care about her and want her around. He just had to hope she'd be calming down sometime soon.

_Just don't give up.__  
__I'm working it out.__  
__Please don't give in.__  
__I won't let you down__  
__It messed me up, need a second to breathe__  
__Just keep coming around.__  
__Hey, what do you want from me?__  
__What do you want from me?_

_Yeah, it's plain to see__  
__that baby you're beautiful.__  
__And it's nothing wrong with you.__  
__It's me – I'm a freak,__  
__but thanks for loving me__  
__Cause you're doing it perfectly._

There was no doubt she was an amazing girl when she wasn't being all crazy. She was beautiful, smart, funny, totally sweet and so many other wonderful things. She was incredible, and here she was, going out with the resident Lima Loser. She took the time to tell him she believed in him; to tell him that she knew he was better. She was the one person (even his Ma had given up eventually) who still thought he could make more of himself. She inspired him; she was saving him.

_There might have been a time__  
__When I would let you step away.__  
__I wouldn't even try but I think__  
__you could save my life_

_Just don't give up.__  
__I'm working it out.__  
__Please don't give in.__  
__I won't let you down__  
__It messed me up, need a second to breathe__  
__Just keep coming around.__  
__Hey, what do you want from me?__  
__What do you want from me?_

Another voice joined him and he almost dropped the guitar as Jesse stepped out of the shadows. But he managed to regain his composure and played on. And he had to admit, it was a pretty cool duet. The guy could sing, no doubt._  
_

_Just don't give up on me__  
__I won't let you down__  
__No, I won't let you down__  
_

_So__  
__Just don't give up.__  
__I'm working it out.__  
__Please don't give in.__  
__I won't let you down__  
__It messed me up, need a second to breathe__  
__Just keep coming around.__  
__Hey, what do you want from me?__  
__What do you want from me?_

They split the last chorus, echoing each other on the last lines, and it sounded so good it sent shivers down his spine.

_Just don't give up.__  
__I'm working it out.__  
__Please don't give in__  
__I won't let you down.__  
__It messed me up, need a second to breathe.__  
__Just keep coming around.__  
__Hey, whataya want from me?__  
__Whataya want from me?__  
__Whataya want from me?__  
__Whataya want from me?_

'So what brings you here ?' He asked as the song ended. Jesse paused, looked at him.

'It's Quinn.' He sighed. 'I really like her. And she says she likes me. But she wasn't too keen on us getting together without seeing if Rachel would be ok with it, given our previous history. That was fair enough and I understood, but Rachel's said it was ok and confirmed it to me, and Quinn's still not enthusiastic about us being together. And I just don't understand what the problem is.' Puck looked at him.

'Thing is Jesse, she's scared that you're gonna turn around and go 'Shit you're pregnant' and ditch her. I know you're cool with it, but so many other guys have treated her like shit cause she's knocked up with my kid. And even though she really wants to think you're different, she'd scared if she does, you'll just prove her wrong and she'll get hurt.' He sighed. 'I'm not proud of knocking her up. But she's a great person, especially now she's ditched the Cheerios. And I know what she's like.' He paused. 'Look, I can't give you a quick fix solution. But if you keep reassuring her it's not an issue, it should help. And maybe if you tell her you'll take things really slowly, then it should be ok.' Jesse looked at him, gratitude plain on his face, and Puck had a sudden thought. 'Hey, do you have any idea why Rachel's gone so crazy this last week?' Jesse gave him a look. Puck shrugged. 'What?'

'She's nervous. You know what she's like. She'd worried that you won't like her if she's not someone important or special. It doesn't matter that you like her as she is; she gets scared too. She knows she's not the most popular girl in school, and I'll bet your reputation makes her feel she's not up to your usual standards.' Puck stared at him, feeling like a complete idiot. 'Just show her she's better than that. It'll take some doing, but you of all people should know best how.' Puck shook his head, sighing.

'Cheers Jesse.' He stood up and put the guitar away. 'But seriously, we've been talking like utter girls, so I'd appreciate it if we didn't tell anyone about this yeah? People already seem to think I'm a sissy.' Jesse nodded with a laugh, and they walked out of the room together.

* * *

Alone in his room that night, having passed up on guy time, Puck couldn't help wondering if someone wasn't out to get him (didn't the good Lord _want_ him to get into Rachel's pants after all?). Otherwise, why the hell did he keep screwing up his chances at happiness with Rachel? He picked up his guitar. _What the hell is it with me and singing today?_ He wondered. _I must be turning into a girl or something. Cause seriously, I think my balls have gone missing._ Sighing, he played a few chords, and then began to sing.

_Bright cold silver moon__  
__Tonight alone in my room__  
__You were here just yesterday__  
__Slight turn of the head__  
__Eyes down when you said__  
__I guess I need my life to change__  
__Seems like something's just aren't the same__  
__What could I say?_

_I need a little more luck than a little bit__  
__Cause every time I get stuck the words won't fit__  
__And every time that I try I get tongue tied__  
__I'll need a little good luck to get me by_

He had no fucking clue how he was going to apologise to Rachel this time, but he knew he was going to do it, no matter what it took. He knew he should have realised she was upset, and he should have reassured her. This was his fault, and he had to make it right.

_I need a little more help than a little bit__  
__Like the perfect one word no one's heard yet__  
__Cause every time that I try I get tongue tied__  
__I need a little good luck to get me by this time_

_I stare up at the stars__  
__I wonder just where you are__  
__You feel a million miles away__  
__(I wonder just where you are)__  
__Was it something I said?__  
__Or something I never did?__  
__Or was I always in the way?__  
__Could someone tell me what to say to just make you stay?_

He felt strangely choked at the idea of her lying alone and hurt in her room, probably crying right now. He wished he could get to her, hug her, and tell her it was ok. But it wasn't going to happen.

_I need a little more luck than a little bit__  
__Cause every time I get stuck the words won't fit__  
__And every time that I try I get tongue tied__  
__I need a little good luck to get me by_

_I need a little more help than a little bit__  
__Like the perfect one word no one's heard yet__  
__Cause every time that I try I get tongue tied__  
__I need a little good luck to get me by this time_

_I know it feels like the end__  
__Don't want to be here again__  
__And we could help each other off the ground so we never fall down again__  
__What it takes I don't care__  
__We're gonna make it I swear__  
__And we could help each other off the ground so we never fall down again__  
__Again_

He couldn't believe they'd overcome their mutual stupidity and all the obstacles in their way to get to this point and have it screwed up all over again. HE couldn't believe he'd manage to mess up _again_.

_I need a little more luck than a little bit__  
__Cause every time I get stuck the words won't fit__  
__But every time that I try I get tongue tied__  
__I need a little good luck to get me by_

_I need a little more help than a little bit__  
__Like the perfect one word no one's heard yet__  
__Cause every time that I try I get tongue tied__  
__I need a little good luck to get me by this time_

_I know it feels like the end__  
__Don't want to be here again__  
__And we could help each other off the ground so we never fall down again__  
__What it takes I don't care__  
__We're gonna make it I swear__  
__And we could help each other off the ground so we never fall down again_

He put down his guitar, his Ma yelling at him to shut up cause it was late and some people needed to _sleep_. He wandered over to his bed and flopped on to it, looking out of his open window at the clear night sky, feeling like an utter woman as he whispered: 'I'll fix this Rachel. I promise.' Then he dragged the quilt over himself and tried to go to sleep.


	2. Battlefield

**A/N: **Well, I'd started writing it, and I figured as I'd left you all hanging with Puck being an idiot, I'd let you see what happens next. From here on, Updates are Wednesday/Fridays.

Featured songs are 'Love Is A Battlefield' by Pat Benatar and 'Hate That I Love You' by Rihanna ft. Ne-Yo

**Sorry I haven't replied to my reviewers, I just don't have the time right now. But I appreciate every review you post, and I make sure to read all of them/listen to any suggestions etc.**

_Thanks to:_

**Reviewers: **Shelz,** izzabella11, **TwilightEmz09,** Kkaty, **Karma22,** sweetcaroline1986 **and** twighlightangel61090**

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**The PHENOMENAL response is inspiring :) **

* * *

**Love is a battlefield...**

Over the weekend, both Rachel and Noah were a mess. Separately, they missed each other like crazy, but somehow just couldn't manage to bring themselves to say. Rachel spent the weekend at Quinn's tell her dads she was practicing for Regionals. In actuality, she spent the two days curled up on Quinn's sofa in her pyjamas, eating Ben&Jerry's, crying a lot and watching trashy daytime television while the blonde did her weekly shop and other chores. Kurt and Mercedes visited, but seeing she was beyond help, they politely excused themselves and made secret pacts to kill Puck if he didn't sort his act out. The man in question was however, sat in his room, doing his homework and getting distracted every five minutes by what an utter dick he'd been and what an idiot he was not to have realised why Rachel was acting weird. All in all, it was a bad weekend for everyone involved.

* * *

Come Monday morning, Puck had planned to speak to Rachel as soon as he got to school, but she wasn't around, and despite his best efforts to find her, she seemed to be conspicuously absent wherever he looked. He fought growing annoyance as she continued to evade him throughout the day, and he constantly found himself on the end of glares from Kurt and Mercedes, and a disapproving glance or two from Quinn the few times he caught sight of her. Knowing they must be keeping her away from him, he decided to give it a rest until Glee – she'd never miss a rehearsal unless she actually had a heart attack, and he doubted even that would stop her.

* * *

But even Mr Schue seemed to be conspiring against him. When they'd all finally arrived (Rachel last, flanked by Kurt and Mercedes), Mr Schue didn't give them any chances to start chatting. Instead, he strode to the center of the room.

'I have a number I want you all to do. We haven't run through it, but I just want to see what you make of it. So we're going to the auditorium.' Everyone complained loudly, but he shook his head firmly. 'Come on guys, where's your fighting spirit? Give it a go ok? Auditorium. Now.' Grumbling, everyone followed him and got on to the stage, standing in a group and looking pretty sulky. Puck was angry because he'd tried to talk to Rachel on the way there, but had been sent packing by a glare from the terrible twosome (aka Kurt and Mercedes).

'Right. I want boys on the left and girls on the right. V formation please, facing each other, not the audience. Puck and Rachel, head up each group.' Puck wondered if Mr Schue was crazy. Or just incredibly insightful. At that moment, the teacher bounded up on to the stage, handing out sheet music to a chorus of groans and gasps (the complaint was from the guys, as usual). 'No complaining, just get on with it guys. I want you to try something new; to really challenge yourselves. I've been soft on you lately, and you have to remember that Regionals are going to be tougher than you realise. Vocal Adrenaline and Aural Intensity are two incredibly competitive, highly-trained, top-notch clubs ok? And if we're going to beat them, we have to be prepared for anything. I know you pulled this off at Sectionals, so this time I'm giving you something none of you chose and you're going to work with it.' He paused, looking at them all. 'I know things aren't always easy for you guys, but we have to work as a team. Now I want you to _feel_ the lyrics, give me some great choreography and good vocals. Puck, you take the spoken bit at the start, and Rachel you sing the backing vocal. Then you can split the vocals between you as you see fit. Take two minutes to sort it.' He waited until they were sorted, then said: 'Right, let's see what you've got!' pressing play and filling the room with a strong Eighties beat.

_(Spoken)_

_We are young__  
__heartache to heartache we stand__  
__No promises no demands__  
__Love is a battlefield._

Rachel's voice, quiet as the echo of his words, burst strongly into the second part of the chorus, her eyes burning his as they walked towards each other in tie with the beat, their respective groups following.

_We are strong__  
__no-one can tell us we're wrong__  
__Searching our hearts for so long__  
__Both of us knowing__  
__Love is a battlefield.__  
_

He struggled to resist sweeping her into his arms as they circled each other, eyes locked, posture fixed aggressively in keeping with the song. Then the verse came and her voice took on a new tone; desperate in a way that tore at his heart.

_You're begging me to go__  
__then making me stay -__  
__Why do you hurt me so bad?__  
__It would help me to know__  
__do I stand in your way__  
__Or am I the best thing you've had?_

Quinn took over, the group moving into the next part of the choreography, each paring off (or in the case of Brittany, finding herself surrounded by four guys, two on either side, all eying her up like meat) and circling, like warriors. Quinn's own eyes were fixed on Jesse, singing defiantly, watching his reactions carefully.

_Believe me__  
__believe me__  
__I can't tell you why__  
__But I'm trapped by your love__  
__and I'm chained to your side._

The two leading pairs took the chorus this time, the girls taking the first part, the boys the second, squaring off side by side, the girls back on the right, the boys back on the left. The two main pairs stayed still, but everyone else stepped from side to side, clicking their fingers in time with the beat, looking at their 'enemies'.

_We are young.__  
__Heartache to heartache we stand,__  
__no promises, no demands:__  
__Love is a battlefield._

_We are strong__  
__no-one can tell us we're wrong__  
__Searching our hearts for so long__  
__Both of us knowing__  
__Love is a battlefield.__  
_

Puck took a deep breath and sang, feeling like an utter girl but determined to show everyone he could do this – that he was a part of the team.

_When I'm losing control__  
__will you turn me away,_

_Or touch me deep inside?__  
__And when all this gets old,__  
__will it still feel the same?__  
__There's no way this will die._

He couldn't help but think Jesse got the easy part. Still, he was man enough to sing a girly song without losing his balls.

_But if we get much closer__  
__I could lose control__  
__And if your heart surrenders _

_You'll need me to hold._

The whole of Glee club partnered up again (you'd feel sorry for Brittany if you didn't know she was loving it), moving into some kind of balletic lifts of embraces. Rachel's skin tingled to be so close to Noah after their long separation, and she relished their closeness. Then the whole group broke into the final chorus and she barely had time to think.

_We are young.__  
__Heartache to heartache we stand,__  
__no promises, no demands:__  
__Love is a battlefield._

_We are strong__  
__no-one can tell us we're wrong__  
__Searching our hearts for so long__  
__Both of us knowing__  
__Love is a battlefield.__  
_

Face to face, breathing heavily as the last beats faded out, Puck whispered

'I made my choice. I didn't even need to think about it – it's you Rachel. I want you.' And he kissed her quickly, a gentle brush of the lips before the music died. Her huge smile was all he needed to know it was going to be ok.

'Guys, that was _fantastic_!' Mr Schue seemed delighted. 'Seriously, I'm so proud of all of you. To put that together on the spot, and to give me such amazing vocals is...well I'm stunned.' He clapped them with a smile. 'Right, well I think that deserves an early finish. But before you go, your assignment for the week is to find a group song about love that we could sing at Regionals ok? See you next rehearsal guys. Good work!' He watched them file out of the auditorium, gathering up his papers with a smile.

'They're good', a voice said from the shadows. 'Really good.'

'What're you doing here?' Will said with a smile. 'If anyone sees you...I'd be in a lot of trouble with the kids.' Shelby Corcoran walked down from the back of the auditorium with a grin, wrapping her arms around his waist and pulling him in for a kiss.

'Nobody saw me. I made sure of that.' She kissed him again, fiercely. 'If you didn't know I was here, why would anybody else?' He raised an eyebrow at her, kissing her back with equal passion. 'Now can we go back to your apartment? It's been a week and you know I get grumpy when you deprive me.' She pouted and he laughed, switching off the lights as they headed out of the school together.

* * *

Rachel and Puck, sitting in slightly awkward silence in his truck, saw them walking hand in hand.

'Mr Schue's with the chick from Vocal Adrenaline? What's with that?' Puck looked angry. Rachel put a hand on his arm making him restrain himself.

'They've been together for a few weeks now. I caught them the other day making out in one of the practice rooms. I believe it's completely innocent. She seems to respect him too much to sabotage our attempts to win at Regionals. Besides, I think they're very similar.' Rachel sighed. 'I know you meant what you said in the auditorium Noah, but I have to ask why you said those...things to me before?' Noah sighed, and rubbed his mohawk.

'I was just...freaking out. It seemed like we'd spent so much time being stupid before we got together, and then we finally did, you went all crazy on my ass.' He looked her apologetically. 'No offence, but you were all mental and totally _not_ the hottie I wanted to go out with. Not that I only went out with you cause you're hot'', he added hurriedly. 'I just didn't get it. You're this amazing person, and then we started going out and you became something...well not amazing', he finished lamely. 'Do you get it?' Rachel, to his surprise, laughed.

'It's so ironic you should say that', she said with a smile. 'See the thing is, I got scared and nervous and I thought you'd like me more if I was something more noticeable, more...well just _more_. And then I realised that it wasn't making you happy and then I was going to try and make things right but you got angry and...'She wrinkled her nose. 'Well here we are.' She looked at him seriously. 'If you say you want to be with me, you have to know that I'm not always easy to live with – jeez you must have realised that by now. But if you say you want me as I am, then I promise to try to be myself, and nobody else.' He nodded.

'You were all I ever wanted Rach. I was just too stupid to see it.' Then he laughed, and pulled her in for a kiss. 'Listen to me sprouting all this girly crap! If the guys heard me, they'd say you have me whipped.' He smiled. 'But I guess you kinda do, and I guess it's ok with me.' She laughed at him, punching him lightly on the arm, wrestling playfully until he pulled her in for another kiss and they got somewhat distracted.

* * *

'We've got a song Mr Schue', Jesse said with a smile as he, Quinn, Puck and Rachel took up stools at the front of the room, the rest of the club lining up behind them. Their teacher held out his hands, and the boy gave a nod to the band who struck up a light rhythm.

_That's how much I love you__  
__That's how much I need you_

_And I can't stand you.__  
__Most everything you do makes me want to smile__  
__Can I not like it for a while?_

They'd agreed to split the song into sections, each pair taking a different verse and the rest of Glee as the chorus in the background. It was a good plan Puck thought with a smile as he opened his mouth to sing, eyes locked on Rachel, who blushed prettily and looked down with a small smile.

_No, but you won't let me__  
__You upset me, girl, and then you kiss my lips__  
__All of a sudden I forget that I was upset__  
__Can't remember what you did__  
_

_But I hate it__  
__You know exactly what to do__  
__So that I can't stay mad at you__  
__For too long, that's wrong_

_But, I hate it__  
__You know exactly how to touch__  
__So that I don't want to fuss and fight no more__  
__Said, I despise that I adore you_

Watching Quinn and Jesse, he smiled, knowing that things between them were sorted now – they were officially a couple and he'd never seen Quinn look so happy (which was saying something, considering she'd had loving from the Puckerone). It felt good to know his friends were happy, even if admitting that did make him wonder if Rachel had turned his balls into earrings or some shit like that.

_And I hate how much I love you, boy__  
__I can't stand how much I need you__  
__And I hate how much I love you, boy__  
__But I just can't let you go__  
__And I hate that I love you so__  
_

_And you completely know the power that you have__  
__The only one that makes me laugh__  
__Sad and it's not fair how you take advantage of the fact__  
__That I love you beyond the reason why__  
__And it just ain't right_

_And I hate how much I love you, girl__  
__I can't stand how much I need you__  
__And I hate how much I love you, girl__  
__But I just can't let you go__  
__But I hate that I love you so__  
_

_One of these days, maybe your magic won't affect me__  
__And your kiss won't make me weak__  
__But no one in this world knows me the way you know me__  
__So you'll probably always have a spell on me._

Rachel looked at Puck, smile and nodding along to the music, wondering if there would ever be a day when he didn't manage to make her skin tingle just by toughing her, or make her belly feel warm with a crooked smile. She somehow doubted it.

_That's how much I love you__  
__That's how much I need you__  
__That's how much I love you__  
__That's how much I need you__  
__And I hate that I love you so_

Mercedes was pulling her diva trick, but nobody minded.

_And I hate how much I love you, boy__  
__I can't stand how much I need you__  
__And I hate how much I love you, girl__  
__But I just can't let you go__  
__But I hate that I love you so__  
__And I hate that I love you so, so__  
_

Mr Schue's round of applause was enough to know they'd done well. And the happy grins on everyone's faces was enough to know they were proud of themselves. Puck blew a kiss to his little Berry, smiling like an idiot. _I don't care if I look like a girl_, he thought with a grin. _She's worth it.  
_


	3. Dreams

**A/N:** Right, so not quite Wednesday, but I'm guessing you guys won't mind :) This chapter has quite a lot of plot development in it, so less fluff, but next chapter will have fluff a-plenty, I promise :)

Song is 'If I Could Be Like That' by 3 Doors Down

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Reviews are **love :)**

* * *

**If I could be like that...**

The next week was, well, blissful. The school gossips noted that there must be something about Glee club – all the members were looking suspiciously perky and generally happy. Quinn and Jesse were the subject of a lot of criticising (mainly levelled at Jesse for dating a pregnant girl), but suddenly, it didn't seem to matter. And even though Puck hated admitting it, Glee was becoming more and more like family to him. He'd made some good friends, and he found they commanded a lot more respect than he'd originally realised.

However, the calm was disturbed when Jesse gave Rachel a cassette to listen to.

'I thought you'd like it', he said with an odd smile, refusing to say any more. And Puck understood why when he sat with Rachel in her room, listening to a woman singing a song he didn't recognise but Rachel seemed to know, and then hearing the woman saying she was Rachel's birth mother. He held her as she wept, mentally making a note to intimidate Jesse a little the next morning - hey, he wasn't gonna mess up Quinn's new boyfriend's face, but nobody made Rachel cry and got away with it – and rocked her gently until her sobs subsided. She fell asleep in his arms, and tenderly, he took off her shoes and carried her to her bed, tucking her under the quilt, kissing her forehead and switching out the light before padding softly out of her room and saying goodnight to her dads.

* * *

Unbeknownst to Puck, Rachel sought out Jesse the next day, knowing he would have the answers she wanted. It was no surprise when he told her that he knew who her mother was.

'I can take you to her if you want. But you have to realise that finding out who she is may open a whole can of worms.' His eyes were kind, and she trusted him, just like she had before. She took a deep breath, and nodded.

'Take me to her. I want to know.' He nodded in return.

'Ok. But there's something I want you to see first.' She followed him to his car, wondering what it could be that he was taking her to see that could possibly be on a par with finding out the identity of her birth mother.

* * *

When she was seated in Vocal Adrenaline's auditorium, she still wondered what she was doing there. The rival Glee Club were excellent, of that there was no doubt, and their performance of 'Tik Tok' by Ke$ha was flawless pop perfection, even if it did feel a little...soulless.

'See? They're weak. They don't have hearts. And that's how we can beat them; that's how we can win.' His voice made her jump slightly, but she looked to see him smiling, and couldn't help but smile in return. If he thought they could do it, then just maybe they had a chance.

At that moment, Shelby Corcoran took to the stage. She didn't look happy.

'Seriously guys, where was the energy? Where was the passion? The dancing was pretty good for a rehearsal, but not good enough to _win_. And the vocals...well you sounded like an advert or something. Too pre-recorded. Too pristine. I want _feeling_ in it, ok?' She sung a few lines, and Rachel's jaw went slack. Shelby was an amazing singer, no doubt, but it wasn't that which shocked her. The voice was unmistakable. The voice was the one she'd heard on the tape. She looked at Jesse, and saw the apprehension in his eyes, understanding in an instant. He hadn't wanted her to see this, not really. He wanted her to _hear _this. To hear her mother, so she could find out for herself. Shocked, she started to shake.

'I know why you brought me here, but I can't face her. Not today', she whispered. 'Give me her phone number. I'll call her. I promise.' He scribbled it on a scrap of paper, and handed it to her, squeezing her arm with an apologetic look, and following her out of the auditorium.

* * *

After he'd dropped her home, she gave in to the tears that had been threatening to fall from the moment she'd realised the truth. Calling Noah, she managed through her sobs to tell him what had happened. He was at her house in fifteen minutes, holding her again, telling her it would all be ok. And she leant against his strong chest and hoped he was right, clinging to him until she felt able to stand alone.

Then she made the call, sitting on her bed while he sat on the floor, long legs stretched out in front of him, watching her anxiously.

'Shelby Corcoran speaking.' She found herself unable to breath, but managed to squeak out:

'It's Rachel Berry, from McKinley High.' There was a silence on the other end of the line. She took a deep breath. 'I'm your daughter.' The silence continued. 'You knew didn't you?' There was a sigh.

'Yes, I knew. And I've been waiting for years for you to know too.' There was a pause. 'Listen, if you don't mind, do you want to meet up for a coffee and talk about this face to face? I think it might be easier.' Rachel was too shocked to speak, until Noah nudged her lightly with his foot.

'Umm yes, yes I think that would be a good idea', she managed to gasp out, barely taking in the arrangement Shelby was making, only just gathering her thoughts enough to say: 'I'll be there. I'll see you on Friday.' Then the phone went dead, and she looked at it blankly until Noah wrapped his arms around her, kissing her hair softly as tears trickled down her face slowly.

* * *

Friday dawned, clear skies and sunshine. Rachel Berry spent the day in a state of complete mental absence, wandering around the school like a robot as she went to all her lessons. Puck watched her anxiously, scared of the consequences this revelation might have for her, especially when the rest of McKinley High found out. And when the rest of New Directions heard...he wasn't sure that they wouldn't rip her to pieces. But as much as it scared him, he knew this was something she had to do alone – she'd shown him that much by talking to Jesse about it without him knowing.

So he stepped back, and dropped her outside Starbucks at 3.00pm, promising to come and pick her up when she called him (he'd told her he didn't want her driving when she was emotional, and to his relief she'd agreed). Then all he could do was go home and lie on his bed, staring up at the ceiling, waiting and worrying about what was going on. For the second time in his life, he felt powerless. And he had to admit, it scared him.

* * *

Across town, Rachel sat at a table with the woman she now knew was her mother. And she just couldn't stop looking at her. She'd seen Shelby before, but she'd never really looked at her properly. Now she found herself taking in the nose so like hers, the strong jaw line, dark colouring. So many things that she recognised in herself; it was like looking into a mirror and seeing yourself twenty years older.

'So...' She hardly knew where to start. There was so much to say; so much to ask. She wished Noah was there to keep her. 'What do you do?' It seemed like such a stupid question once she'd asked it, but she was struggling to make a picture in her head of this woman who'd been missing all her life.

'Well, obviously, I'm the coach for Vocal Adrenaline, but when I'm not doing that or teaching, I'm in the music business. I'm a head-hunter, I guess you could say. I look out for new talent, and if I find anyone, I send them to the record company I work for. And from there...well the future is for them to make. But I do act as a mentor sometimes.' She shrugged her shoulders. 'Does that answer your question?' Rachel nodded, trying to make the pieces fit. Shelby spoke again, shaking her out of her reverie.

'I was 18 years old, had just graduated and didn't have the money to go to college. Your fathers had placed an ad in the paper, and I met with them about it. They seemed like good people, and the money was good – very good. Good enough to let me get into the college I wanted to go to.' She sighed. 'I was so young. I had no idea how things chance when you're pregnant – how attached you become to the life inside you. But I'd signed a contract, and I stuck to it. I stayed in Columbus, working until I got too big, and then giving piano lessons until it was time.' She paused, hands wrapped around her coffee, staring deep into the mug. 'I was in labour for twelve hours, and then out you popped, this beautiful little girl.' She smiled to herself. 'You were a charmer, even then. You came out smiling they tell me. And certainly half the nurses in the hospital visited you while I was there.' Rachel's eyes filled with tears at the tenderness in her voice, and her heart squeezed almost painfully. Shelby sat up a little straighter, and continued.

'Anyway, I looked after you for the first six months, and then we'd reached the end of our agreement, and I gave you to your dads.' She sighed, a painful sound. 'They took you away. Not to keep you from me I don't think, but because they wanted to raise you somewhere quieter – somewhere you could play in the backyard safely, and not have to worry too much about you getting hit by cars or anything.' She paused again. 'They sent me letters, every year, and they told me about you.' Her eyes filled with tears. 'I was so proud of you. So proud of my beautiful little girl.' She sniffed, wiping her eyes. 'I'm sorry', she said, before collecting herself.

'Anyway, five years ago, I got a teaching job here in Lima, purely by chance. I didn't know you were here, just that you were in-state. I only found out when I contacted your dads to let them know I'd changed address.' She looked at Rachel piercingly. 'You must be wondering why I didn't let you know who I was sooner.' The girl nodded, eyes fixed on her mother's face. 'There was nothing in the contract to say I couldn't. But I had agreed that if I approached you and you said you didn't want to see me, I wouldn't try to contact you again. So I left it until you were old enough to understand. And then I left it a little longer because I was scared you wouldn't like me. I still am I guess', she said with a wry smile. 'But then I saw you at Sectionals and I just...I had to meet you. I wanted to know you; to understand the girl with my smile. I wanted to see what you were like behind the voice.' Rachel nodded, ignoring the tears trickling down her cheeks.

'Why did you get Jesse to give me the tape? Why didn't you approach me yourself?' she managed to say. Shelby reached over, wiping away a tear, and then drawing back with a look of guilt. Rachel shook her head. 'It's ok.' The older woman nodded.

'Well, I thought it might be a threatening just to have this woman come up and say "Oh hi, I'm your birth mother" so I thought if someone you liked and trusted gave the tape to you without your knowledge, you could make up your own mind about it. And since you had been out with Jesse and I'd known him through our Glee club, he seemed like the perfect candidate.' She smiled. 'Besides, I knew a smart kid like you would know that he knew where to find me. So I figured, if you wanted to meet me after all, you'd turn to him. Seems like I was right.'

'I came to one of Vocal Adrenaline's rehearsal, the day I called you', Rachel confessed. 'But I wasn't ready to meet you – not there; not then.' Shelby nodded.

'I understand that. And I don't think mid-rehearsal is when I'm at my best, that's for sure. I'm something of a perfectionist.' _I guess that's another thing we have in common_, thought Rachel. Then she looked at her daughter. 'Anyway, enough about me. Tell me about you.' And Rachel, now on safer ground, launched into her life story.

* * *

When Puck picked her up at six, Rachel looked exhausted but happy. She waved to him as he pulled up outside the coffee house, pointing him out to Shelby Corcoran, who bore a seriously scary resemblance to his girlfriend (_No shit, Sherlock_, said a small part of his brain) and said something to her that made Rachel crease up in giggles. _She can't be all bad I guess_, he thought with relief. He watched as Rachel hugged her enthusiastically, before bounding up to his truck and bouncing into the passenger seat, practically glowing and talking at a hundred miles a minute. He laughed, glad to see she was ok.

'Slow down babe', he said with a smiled. 'I got about one word in twenty of that.' To his surprise, she just grabbed him and kissed him, hard. Then she smiled like the sun.

'Come back to mine and I'll tell you all about it', she said, beaming at him. He nodded, not wanting to leave her when she looked like this, and when there was the offer of free food. Starting the truck again, he pulled away from Starbucks, noticing how Shelby watched them until they were out of sight.

* * *

She'd calmed down a little by the time Monday got there, and he felt ok about leaving her alone for an afternoon as he made his way to the empty practice room with his guitar. There was a song he'd wanted to sing for a while, and he wanted some space to himself, just to get it right. Strumming the guitar softly as he sat down, he began to sing.

_He spends his nights in California,__  
__Watching the stars on the big screen, __  
__Then he lies awake and he wonders, __  
__Why can't that be me?__  
__Cause in his life he is filled__  
__With all these good intentions__  
__He's left a lot of things__  
__He'd rather not mention right now__  
__But just before he says goodnight,__  
__He looks up with a little smile at me,__  
__And he says,_

The words called to him, and he found himself getting strangely choked up as he finally found a way to say all the things he'd been feeling since he'd found out Quinn was having his baby.

_If I could be like that,__  
__I would give anything__  
__Just to live one day, in those shoes__  
__If I could be like that,__what would I do?__  
__What would I do?_

He didn't want to be a Lima loser. He didn't want to turn into his father. And even though he'd never admit it, he'd dreamed of reaching out to the people who felt just like he did. He'd even written a couple of songs, although not even Rachel would manage to get him to show them to anyone. But he'd wanted to say how it felt, to try to escape from a deadbeat town even when everything was against.

_Now in dreams we run..._

_She spends her days up in the north park,__  
__Watching the people as they pass__  
__And all she wants is just__  
__A little piece of this dream,__  
__Is that too much to ask__  
__With a safe home, and a warm bed,__  
__On a quiet little street__  
__All she wants is just that something to__  
__Hold onto, that's all she needs__  
__Yeah!_

Standing in the doorway, looking at his back, Rachel felt sadness well up in her throat at the determination that verged on desperation in his voice. She'd only heard Noah sing with such passion a very few times before, and it made her heart skip a beat if she was honest. There was something undeniably sexy about him when he was filled with such raw intensity.

_If I could be like that,__  
__I would give anything__  
__Just to live one day, in those shoes__  
__If I could be like that, what would I do?__  
__What would I do?_

He cursed as he missed a note, and began again from the beginning. And in the doorway, Rachel pressed 'Record' on her phone, holding her breath as he sung.

_I'm falling into this, dreams,__  
__We run away_

The second time around, he didn't screw up, and carried on flawlessly, his voice dropping to just above a whisper, as tender as a lover. She prayed he wouldn't notice her presence as he carried on singing. She wanted so badly to hear the end of this.

_If I could be like that,__  
__I would give anything__  
__Just to live one day, in those shoes__  
__If I could be like that, what would I do?__  
__What would I do?_

He sung desperately, for every dream he'd ever had, for every wish he'd ever made, and for every time hopes had been crushed. He let out every frustration he'd had over the past couple of months, and for the first time, he felt free in a way that he usually only felt with Rachel. And it felt good.

_If I could be like that,__  
__I would give anything__  
__Just to live one day, in those shoes__  
__If I could be like that, what would I do?__  
__What would I do?_

_If I could be like that,__  
__I would give anything__  
__Just to live one day, in those shoes_

_If I could be like that, what would I do,__  
__What would I do__  
__Falling in__  
__I feel I am falling in, to this again._

The song ended, and he felt as if all the pain had drained out of him. Somewhat empty inside, he sat staring into space, not noticing as Rachel stopped recording on her phone and tiptoed away, seeing that he needed time alone. And so he stayed until the janitor told him he was locking up. Then he picked up his guitar and went home, feeling like he'd run a marathon.

* * *

After she left him, Rachel headed home in a rush, quickly uploading the recording from her phone on to her laptop. Playing it, she pleased to hear the quality was ok. Then she burnt it on to a CD, and picked up her phone, speed dialling a number with slightly shaky hands.

'Shelby? Hi.' She didn't want to call her Mom. Not yet. 'I need a favour.' She twirled the CD around her finger, staring at it absently as she explained what she wanted.


	4. Changes

**A/N: **Sorry this chapter took so long - I've been really busy and had minor writer's block, both of which conspired against me to make this so late. Anyway, here it is, and now we have some** LEMON**. Ok, not quite, but the last section is a little more ***ahem*** adult in its themes so don't read if it's not your thing. Also, please note that in this, Will and Emma never got together again after Terri disrupts them in 'Hell-O'.

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**Reviewers: **Maiqu**, blackgem88,** twighlightangel61090,** FREAKTONIGHT,** aussietasha,** Kkaty **and** wtb4ever**

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Reviews are love :) Next update will be...sometime next week hopefully.

* * *

**Changes**

Shelby got back to her two days later with a positive reception, and promised to put him forward to the record label she represented.

'Obviously, it's not great quality and there's not any certainty that this would get him anywhere, but I like his voice, and the fact that he can play guitar is great from a sales perspective. I'll see what I can do ok Rach?' Rachel smiled down the phone in relief and happiness, making a mental note to spend more time with her mother by way of a thank you.

'Thank you _so_ much Shelby; this means so much to me.'

* * *

A week or so later when Shelby called again and told her the good news, she shrieked down the phone and danced around her room for about half an hour afterwards because she was so excited. Her dads thought she'd gone crazy, but she couldn't contain the wonder of it, and her happiness about what Noah was going to say when he found out.

Of course, it was only to be expected that he took it in a totally Puck-like manner, acting very much like the badass he supposedly was, while his entire thought process basically shrunk to _Well shit_. Rachel just giggled at him, knowing that he was in complete shock, but that when he stopped acting like a total imbecile, he would be over the moon and she could actually get some intelligent conversation out of him other than the current

'So, some dude wants me to make a record? Like a CD or some shit like that?'

And she also knew that once he'd had time to let it sink in, she was going to be having one of the steamiest makeout sessions of her life. She'd be a liar if she said she wasn't looking forward to it.

* * *

Rachel hadn't anticipated, of course, that he'd have to go to LA to record. And suddenly she found herself without the boy she'd come to rely on, and in a total panic for Regionals, which were coming up faster and faster. Noah was away for a week and it scare her just how much she missed him; just how much of her sanity seemed to depend on him. She knew she'd managed without him before, and she knew she'd had a whole life where she'd been without him but had held herself together and still achieved nigh on perfection. But now...that life seemed like a different memory, and she had to hold herself back to keep from calling him every hour. Instead, she looked forward to the hour every day when he called her and told her about what he'd been up to. It was her lifeline in her now chaotic world.

'I miss you Rachel', he said tenderly. 'I know I've only been away for a couple of days, but...it's kind of crazy not having you around. And I wish you were here, cause it's an amazing city and I'd love to show you all the things I've seen already.' He sighed. 'A week feels like too long without you.' She let out a sigh of relief.

'Oh Noah I'm so glad you said that! I feel like I'm going mad without you, and I was so scared you wouldn't feel the same way.' She smiled. 'I'm glad you're enjoying it though. And who knows...maybe one day we'll see LA together.' He chuckled down the phone and she felt warm inside.

'If you want to see LA then you're coming with me next time', he said. 'Besides, I want to show off my totally hot girlfriend to the douchebags here.' She could practically hear the smirk in his voice, and she loved the way it made her feel. She loved the way he laid claim to her.

'Well I suppose I could think about that. After all, it's not like I have anything better to do with my time', she said with a grin. Then she paused. 'I miss you too. I know it's stupid but...well, just come home soon ok?' She couldn't quite bring herself to tell him her fears. Certainly not on the phone anyway.

'I'll see you on Saturday Rach. Take care of yourself.' He hung up with a click and she sighed gently. Four days seemed like too long all of a sudden.

* * *

The days without him passed slowly, and she felt like she was walking through treacle when she was at school. Even Glee seemed to lose its sparkle and she felt like she was moving from a life in technicolour to one lived in shades of grey. _If this is what I'm like when he's gone for a week, how will I survive when he goes to college_? She wondered. _And how am I meant to tell him that I feel like this when I don't even know for sure if he feels the same?_ With a sigh, she pushed the thoughts out of her head and tried to focus on the song they were supposed to be rehearsing for Regionals. But after another ten unproductive minutes she picked up her phone and sent a quick text, waiting for a response before grabbing a jacket and her bag. Running down the stairs, she locked the door behind her and sat on the front porch until a now-familiar car drew up. With a smile, she got up and bounced down to the car, hopping into the passenger seat.

'Hi Shelby', she said with a grin. 'Thanks for this. I just...had to get out.' Her mother looked at her with a smile of her own and drove off.

'Problems practicing?' Rachel nodded. Shelby sighed slightly. 'God I miss being young sometimes.' She smiled when Rachel looked at her with concern. 'Oh no, don't worry, I'm not actually sad. I just mean, it's never the same after that first guy who makes it hard to see straight sometimes. You miss him don't you?' Rachel nodded again as they headed towards Shelby's house, which was on the other side of town.

'All the time. It's actually rather pathetic. He's only been gone five days, and I'll see him this Saturday, but it feels like forever and...well it scares me a little how much this has affected me.' She took a deep breath. 'Shelby, do you...do you think I'm too young to be in love?' She looked out of the window, face burning, not wanting to see the look on her mother's face. Shelby laughed at her eyes squeezed shut in embarrassment.

'Of course not Rachel!' The answer surprised her and she looked round, her eyes wide in shock. The older woman glanced at her for a second before her eyes returned to the road. 'You're about the age where you're bound to be falling in love. I was about your age the first time I fell in love. I mean, he was a complete idiot and I really should have known better, but I did love him and he seemed to care about me.' She glanced at her daughter again. 'If you think you love Noah, well, the only person who can really tell you for sure is yourself. But it has to be said, some of the clichés about it are true. The butterflies, pulse racing, all that kind of thing isn't love _itself_, but it's part of it.' She pulled up outside her house, killing the engine and turning to look at the girl with her, her gaze serious. 'If you think you love him, take some time to be sure. Because if you're going to tell him, or he asks you, you need to know you're not telling him lies.' Then she smiled, her face softening. 'Now come on in and we can talk some more in comfort.' Rachel nodded with a smile, thinking that just maybe discovering who her birth mother was could be the start of something really special.

* * *

The day Noah got back was one that she thought would be imprinted in her memory forever. She'd woken up to a beautiful morning, sun streaming through the curtains and birds singing loudly. She'd bounced out of bed, a big smile on her face as she remembered what day it was. Brightly, she'd whizzed through her exercise routine, showered, dressed and then sat down to eat breakfast before she recorded her myspace offering for that day. Then, unable to sit still for more than about five minutes, she called Quinn and headed to the mall to do some shopping for the imminent arrival of Pucklet, as the unborn child was now affectionately known.

* * *

Arriving in town had been her first shock of the day. She'd found Quinn sitting in Starbucks, staring blankly out of the window, her cappuccino sitting untouched in front of her.

'Quinn, are you ok?' she asked with concern, taking in the empty expression in her friend's eyes. The blonde turned to look at her, eyes slightly hollow.

'They've pulled out.' Rachel looked at her with confusion. 'The parents who were going to adopt her have decided they don't want another child. So they're not going to adopt her.' Rachel sat down with a thump, eyes wide. Quinn's own eyes welled up, and she began to cry. 'What am I going to do Rachel? She's due in less than a month and I have nobody to give her to.' She buried her face in her hands, sobbing. Rachel hurried to hug her, stroking her back soothingly and whispering words of reassurance, but not feeling anything like as confident as she'd sounded.

* * *

The shopping trip proved to be too much of a strain, so Rachel had called Shelby and asked if it would ok for them to drop in, feeling that an adult might be better at settling Quinn's mind at this time.

'Come on in Quinn', she said kindly, taking in the large bump with a flick of surprise but considerable sympathy in her expression. Quinn looked at her in astonishment, clearly wondering what they were doing at the house of the coach of Vocal Adrenaline. Rachel saw Shelby looking at her with apprehension. She took a deep breath.

'Quinn...I haven't told you this yet but...Shelby is my birth mother. Jesse sort of introduced us a few weeks back.' She paused, taking in her friend's face. 'I'm sorry I haven't told you this before but...I was worried that you would be angry, or think I was betraying Glee.' Quinn looked at her for a few seconds more and laughed.

'Rachel Berry, you are such an idiot sometimes', she said with a smile. 'Do you really think I would care that your birth mom is Shelby Corcoran? _Seriously?_ Come _on,_ I have a baby in my stomach that is going to grow up not knowing who I am. As if I could talk.' Then her face clouded over, and she looked at Shelby. 'Sorry, can I come in? I had a shock this morning and, well, the baby is being a pain. I could really use a chair right about now.' Shelby nodded and they went into the kitchen.

'The parents who were going to adopt Quinn's child have pulled out of the adoption', Rachel explained after Shelby looked at her questioningly, the kettle boiling slowly in the background. 'And now the baby is due in a few months and Quinn has nobody to give her little girl too.' Shelby took the blonde's hands in hers, looking into her face with a soft expression.

'I'm sorry to hear that Quinn. I know how hard it is to be pregnant so young, and I can't imagine how hard your situation must be.' Then an unidentifiable expression passed over her face, and she stood up with a slight frown on her face. 'Rachel, could you make the tea please honey? I need to make a call.' She walked out of the room, leaving the two girls alone.

'She is so _cool_', Quinn said enviously. 'Seriously, this house is beautiful, and she's such an amazing singer and coach. It's kind of inspiring.' She looked thoughtful for a minute. 'You know, it's really encouraging meeting her. I mean, if she managed to have you and then wind up as this awesome vocal coach, then maybe I can make something of my life too.' She smiled, looking a little less distressed.

'She's a talent scout too', Rachel added without thinking. 'She presents acts to her record company, which is how I got Noah to LA.' Quinn looked at her with wide eyes.

'That's _amazing!'_ she breathed. 'I want to _be _her.' Rachel laughed and poured them both a cup of tea.

* * *

They'd been sitting chatting for ten minutes when Shelby came back into the kitchen. For the first time since Rachel had met her properly, she looked nervous. She straightened her top, then sat down on a chair facing Quinn's.

'I have an idea that might help you out', she said. Then she took a deep breath. 'I want to adopt your baby. Well, I want to adopt her with...Will Schuester.' Quinn's eyes widened to the size of plates, and she gaped at the woman sitting across from her.

'But Shelby you've only been with him for what, two months?' Rachel was as stunned by the suggestion as her friend. 'Isn't that a bit soon?' Her mother looked her, clearly gaining confidence.

'Well, yes, I suppose it is...but the thing is honey, I really like him.' She stopped. 'God, I sound like such a teenager.' She laughed. 'Anyway, the fact is, he seems to feel the same way about me. And...well I want to start a family. I'm not getting any younger, and to use a cliché, my biological clock is ticking. But I've been with Will for nearly four months now, and I guess it just feels like the right thing to do. He agrees with me.' She looked at Quinn. 'I'm not saying you have to agree with this, but you have my offer if you'd like it. We both earn enough to live comfortably, if not in great luxury. We'd love her like she was our own.' Quinn looked back at her, eyes filling with tears.

'That would be so amazing', she said thickly, blinking back the tears. Shelby's face split into a huge grin, and she seemed to radiate happiness.

'You can think about this until she's born, but we're here, and we're sure we want this. So...whenever you decide this is definitely what you want, just tell us.' She frowned momentarily. 'Although I think you should probably discuss this with Noah. I mean, I'd like it if you would.' Quinn nodded.

'It's the least I could do', she said, her face wiped of its worry. Rachel smiled at her, wondering if the day could get any more exciting.

* * *

It did. When Noah turned up on her doorstep looking brown and a whole lot more confident, she could hardly peel herself off him for the next few hours. They had a meal with her dads, who let them both have a couple of glasses of wine, and Rachel found herself getting more than a little giggly. Then her fathers went out, and before she knew what she was doing, she'd lead Noah up the stairs to her room, and they were on her bed making out.

His kisses seared her lips, and she felt desire growing inside her, warming her stomach and sending small shivers down her skin. The weight of his body on top of her was both frightening and at the same time, and she couldn't help but arch against him as his hand reached gently under her top to stroke her stomach. It wasn't the first time he'd done this, or the furthest they'd gone, but somehow tonight it felt different and she knew all of a sudden it wasn't enough.

She deepened the kiss, tongues tangled, one of her hands on the small of his back, pulling him closer and the other running her fingers through the short length of his hair. He nipped her lip gently and a small moan of contentment escaped her. She could hear his breathing was equally as ragged as his, and she pulled him into another kiss, her hands exploring under his shirt nails drawn lightly over his back, making him hiss.

'Rach, this sure is a welcome', he said with a slight chuckle in her ear, his voice low and gravelly. It went straight to the centre of her, and she could feel herself becoming more turned on with every second. His hand began to explore further under her shirt, a familiar if still relatively new territory for them. His calloused fingers on her skin made her catch her breath and the feel of them on her breast was enough to make up her mind for sure.

Still kissing him, she took his other hand and placed it on her thigh, moving it up slowly, shivering in delight at the feel of his skin on hers. It was new to her, but she found she wasn't scared. The slow trail up her leg was driving her more wild with desire than she'd thought was possible and she kissed him furiously; hungrily, demanding more.

Then he pulled back.

'Shit Rachel', he said, his eyes hungry on hers, and a darker brown than she'd ever seen them, flecked with brilliant green. 'We have to stop.' She looked at him in confusion, sliding a hand down to the obvious bulge in his jeans, unsure what to do, but stroking over it in a way that she hoped felt good. The almost groan that came from his lips seemed to tell her she was on the right track, but as she was about to continue, her hand was removed.

Noah sat up, turning away from her.

'Stop Rachel', he said without looking at her. 'We're not doing this.' She hardly knew what to say.

'But Noah...' she paused, then gathered her courage. 'I _want_ to do this. I want us to do this.' She sighed. 'I know I don't know everything there is to know about...sex... but I'm more than willing to learn if you'll teach me. And tonight, well, my dads are out, and you've just got back and it certainly seems like it might as well now. I mean, it's not like it's my first time.' She reached over to him, turning his face and planting a kiss on his lips. He as they broke apart.

'I know. And trust me, it's not like I don't want to. But you missed out on a lot of things with Finn, and I want you to experience them.' He paused, kissing her very gently on the lips. 'I know you're not thanking me now, but trust me, you will later. When we do, I want you to be entirely comfortable with me, and with yourself. And I want you to be certain it's what you want, not just because I've come home or something.' He kissed her again, and she melted in to him a little. 'Just trust me ok?' She nodded.

'Ok. I mean...right now I know I want to but, I guess, it would be ok to wait.' She half smiled at him. 'For the badass with a reputation for getting into the pants of every attractive girl under the sun, you certainly are a gentleman.' He looked at in concern, about to speak, when she silenced him with a kiss. 'I like it', she said with a proper smile. 'It makes me feel special.' He smiled back, pulling her in for a deeper kiss.

'Well we're sorted then', he said a few moments later. 'But in the mean time...I can make you feel a helluva lot more special if you'll let me.' His wink was lewd but his eyes were kind and she nodded, surrendering herself to him. And some time later, when he'd swept her away with feelings she'd never thought she'd feel with a man, she decided that maybe waiting wouldn't be so bad if he could do things like that with just his fingers.


	5. Time

**A/N:** First and foremost, I am SO sorry for not updating sooner. I know how much it annoys me personally when a story is left incomplete. All I can say is my muse deserted me and life's been manic for months. Combine the two and you have the occasional 50 words getting squeezed out, which does not make a decent chapter. Still, hopefully the next chapters SHOULD take less time.

Anyway, I had a sudden blast of inspiration yesterday and wrote about 1,500 words, which was added to this morning with another 500 or so. The end result is a slightly shorter chapter than previous installments and more plot than fluff, but personally, I'm proud of it and I like the tone. It also means this fic will be a few chapters longer than I planned - more Puckleberry to fit in!

A few things to note: I've ret-conned our new recruit to be Sam - I really love him in the new season and I'm glad I can work him into the story. He will be straight, but won't be with Quinn - I like the Quinn/Jesse pairing too much to split them up. I've also stolen one of the mash-ups from the second season because it is WIN and as well as this, I've used some music that has only JUST been released ie. the last few weeks. I think it works, but I'd love to know what you think.

Finally: I'm sorry, but I've decided not to shout out to everyone who reviews/favourites/subscribes because it takes SO much time and clutters up this A/N and my inbox. I'm really sorry about that, and for not replying to all the reviews, but this does not mean I appreciate them any less. I love you all for the support you show myself and this story - thank you so much! And sorry for SUCH a long Author's Note.

Reviews are fantastic - hearing what you think is awesome, be it good, bad or mediocre :)

* * *

**Time Flies**

Rachel's time passed in a flash once Puck was back and while she sometimes felt like everything was slipping out of control a little, she liked that he made her days pass in the blink of eye; she loved that time spent with him was so easy. In fact, the only frightening thing about the days going so fast was that with every minute they were closer to Regionals. And despite this, their song selections were not going well.

Then, one day Mr Schue (unknowingly) provided them with an ideal performance.

'Guys, I think we need to challenge ourselves to get some ideas. So I want you split into boys and girls and-' His words were met with a chorus of groans and even Rachel had to admit, after the last gender competition she wasn't sure this was a good idea. But then he said something that changed everything and she thought that just _maybe_ this could work out ok. 'If you'll let me finish, I want you to choose songs that go against the traditional gender roles. So ladies, if you look for something a little more heavy – maybe some Rolling Stones, some AC/DC if you're feeling really adventurous- and give us something tough, hardcore and very masculine.' He paused, a devious look in his eyes.

'Whereas you guys... I want you to find something softer, more feminine; something about emotion from a female perspective rather than just about sex ok? Take a look at some modern female artists like Rihanna and Katy Perry, but also at some older icons – Arethra Franklin, Diana Ross or even Barbra Streisand.'

Rachel noticed with interest that while the guys looked ever so slightly uncomfortable, all the girls looked excited and interested and Tina was talking to Brittany in hushed whispers. She smiled, knowing that _this_ fight they would win fair and square.

Of course, when push came to shove, fitting Quinn into the required costume proved more than little difficult.

'It's ok Rach', she said with a smile. 'I'm not sure all that jiggling around would be good for the baby anyway. So I think I'll just sit this one out when it comes to actually performing.' She looked at her friend a little shyly suddenly. 'I'd love to sing in rehearsal if that's ok though.' Rachel looked at her with surprise, wondering Quinn would think it would be anything other than ok that she wanted to sing in Glee.

'Q, I swear those hormones are making you crazy. Of _course_ you can sing in rehearsals!' She knew she'd said the right thing when Quinn's face lit up and she hugged her, hard. 'Anyway, enough! We have about 90 million sequins and studs to sew on with the girls and we also need to get our choreography just right. C'mon!' She looked at her friend, threading her needle. 'You know, if we win this thing and we go to Regionals singing this, you **are** singing with us.' Quinn's face lit up and she was midway through saying thank you when Rachel cut her off. 'Not so fast Q! This means you have to make another outfit so don't thank me just yet!' But somehow, she didn't think the pregnant blonde was complaining.

* * *

Just as she'd expected, they completely nailed their performance. One look at the jaws on the floor and the slightly uncomfortable shifting in their seats from many of the boys told her they had a winner. Even Jesse's unquestionably brilliant solo (who needed Finn?) had not been enough to win them the competition and the next thing they knew, the mash-up had been added to their set list for Regionals. It was thrilling, to say the least and Puck's annoyance at not winning had been quelled by her appearing at his door in her outfit. They spent the next three hours in his room 'listening to boy music' while he made her cry out strings of vowels and then his name before she managed to turn the tables on him.

* * *

However, two days later, all thoughts of listing to music in Puck's room was pushed from her mind as they struggled to find a second song for regionals. If they'd thought that finding the first song was hard, this proved even more difficult, because as Puck put it 'We've already got something so rad and awesome everything else seems lame by comparison'. Rachel could _not _condone his awful vocabulary and grammar, but she had to admit her boyfriend had a valid point. Her usual favourites seemed a bit flat now and even Barbra wasn't giving her any inspiration.

Sitting in a silent glee club, she sighed. They all – including Mr Schue – looked dejected and uninspired, without any hint of which direction of where they should go... _We're without a direction to go in,_ she thought. _Kind of ironic considering we're the _"New Directions"_ when you think about it._ Suddenly, something clicked in her head. _New directions!_

'Everyone, I have an idea', she said, a familiar smile back on her face. Unsurprisingly, her announcement was not met with much enthusiasm, but nobody challenged her, so she stood up and wrote their name on the white board.

'Rachel, I think we know our name', Mr Schue said, sounding a little frustrated. She smiled even more widely.

'I know we do. And that is the beautiful simplicity of my idea!' Some slight interest in her words appeared in her peers' faces, so she carried on. 'I think we can all agree that our mash-up of 'Start Me Up' and 'Livin' on a Prayer' is pretty original and _new_, yes?' There were some nods from the group and she felt with a refreshed certainty that this was a good idea; a _winning _idea. 'And we are the _new_ directions. Except, most of the time the songs we perform are nothing new to us. I mean, that's not to say that Journey isn't excellent and worthy, nor any of the other songs we've performed. But, you have to admit that nearly all of them are mainstream, or have been mainstream, or, failing that, are well known. I mean yes, we've ventured into funk and rap occasionally but you can't tell me they weren't easily recognised songs.' She took a deep breath. 'So, I think we should take our name literally and search for _new directions _to take our performances from. If we look at less easily recognised genres of music with less easily recognised artists or songs, we can theme our regionals performance around those songs!' She stood silently, waiting for a response.

'Rachel...I'm impressed!' Mr Schue's face was creased with a smile. 'Well done for taking what was right under our noses and making us see it.' She smile shyly, inwardly thrilled that this suggestion wasn't met with the derision some of her previous efforts had been. 'Right everyone, this week's assignment is to look into less popular musical genres and find songs and artists who are **not** widely known.' He took a moment to look at them seriously. 'Remember though guys, these do have to be songs we can perform at Regionals, so nothing with inappropriate lyrics for a public audience.' A few eye rolls and mutters met this reminder but in general, the group looked a lot more energetic and revived than it had since their last assignment.

'Well done Rach', Puck said as he came up behind her, strong arms wrapping around her in a warm hug. 'Once again, you've managed to see what the rest of us Neanderthals forgot to notice.' She poked him sharply, frowning up at him. He laughed. 'Ok, ok, I didn't mean we're all idiots. God, you're bossy for a midget aren't you?'

'Noah!' she shrieked, but she was laughing and he knew she wasn't mad. He kissed her softly on the head and they walked hand in hand to his truck, discussing music as they went.

* * *

A week passed, minutes flying by with frightening speed. The day dawned for their submissions of new music and the music room was buzzing as they sat down to share their contributions. Nobody was talking about songs, it was true. Kurt and Mercedes were in a corner sharing laughter and gossip. Kurt blushed, smiling happily and Rachel made a mental note to ask him later what was going on there. Matt and Sam, their new recruit – all white blonde hair and full lipped good looks- were chatting about sports and the upcoming season. Mike and Tina seemed to be discussing some Asian convention they'd both been to recently and next to them, Artie and Brittany were talking about something – whatever it was, it seemed to be pretty funny. However, Rachel couldn't help but notice the sly looks shooting between Brittany and Mike and she wondered if it was something about Glee that made finding someone easier. Smiling at the thought she turned her attention to Noah as he slid into a seat beside her, plating an affectionate kiss on the top of her head and pulling her towards him for a proper kiss. She giggled, but kept her laughter in as Mr Schue appeared.

'Right everyone, as you all know, this week's assignment was to find something less well known from less mainstream music genres. So, who'd like to go first?'

'Oh I have something Mr Schue!' Kurt stood up, looking animated. 'It's by a British duo called Hurts – they're as synth or electro pop, or even New Wave- and it's called 'Wonderful Life'' At this, a lot of the boys began to look disparaging and Rachel had to admit she wasn't particularly enthused. But she could not deny Kurt sang very well and that the song **did **have good opportunities for them as a group as well as possible female solos (begrudgingly she admitted to herself Mercedes might sound better on this track). Still, she didn't think it was likely this would end up being their final selection.

Next up was something she was looking forward to – Mercedes taking the lead with Brittany and Tina backing her up on a song called 'Many Moons' by the newly known Janelle Monae who fit into the afro-punk and R&B categories. As usual, Mercedes sang strongly and with conviction, managing to gloss over some of the less audience friendly lyrics with her talent. The song was operatic, dramatic and had a good beat; imagining them performing it at Regionals was not much of a stretch and she could always find another song to shine on personally. It seemed like she was not the only one thinking this as she looked at the grin on Mr Schue's face. The boys still weren't looking very enthusiastic, but then they rarely did on anything that didn't have a guitar solo or heavy bass.

Then, with a happy shiver, she the boys were hanging back and she knew it was time for the duet between herself and Quinn. Something of a labour of love, their song was something she was really, really proud of. For once feeling something almost like nerves, she squared her jaw and looked into the eyes of her fellows.

'We're going to sing a song by a British artist called Jessie J. She falls into the pop, R&B and soul genres, so we thought she qualifies and you wouldn't mind us choosing this song.' She realised she was rambling and took a deep breath. 'The song is called 'Who You Are' and we think it speaks for what we all go through every day.' She took a seat on the stool beside Quinn's and nodded to the band. The guitar struck up softly and she listened to Quinn begin to sing softly, voice growing as the song picked up intensity. Her heart squeezed as everyone began to clap in time to the song and then they were singing together. Then Quinn was silent and it was just her voice, alone. The pleasure of singing overtook her and she lost herself in the music; in the message they were trying to send. The words tripped off her tongue and before she knew it everyone had joined in, providing a beautiful back up choir. Her eyes filled with happy tears and she continued to sing with Quinn until the last note of the guitar hung in the air.

'Wow. Just wow you two.' Mr Schue seemed almost speechless. 'I think we have our ballad sewn up then.' The boys began to look concerned.

'Mr Schue, does that mean we don't need to perform?' Puck asked, a note of anxiety in his voice. 'I mean, you've got two songs now so I guess that means you don't want to hear our submission.'

'Not at all Puck! We can perform up to three numbers – that is, music numbers as a whole. So please, if you'd like to show up what you've got today.' He indicated the now empty floor and the boys took to it, looking eager.

'We have Tina to thank for this', Artie said with a smile. 'I heard this song on her laptop.' Tina looked shocked and Rachel's interest was piqued. 'The band is labelled as alternative rock or baroque pop genres. The song is 'Ready to Go' by Panic! At The Disco.' Tina's expression turned to one of pure joy and when the first bars of the song played, Rachel could understand why.

The chorus of strong male voices that seemed filled with joy was followed by a surprise; their newest recruit, Sam, could sing. And he could sing _well_, his voice melodious and acrobatic, with Jesse and Artie providing great harmonies. She found herself smiling, an indescribable happiness filling her up inside as the music rose into a triumphant chorus. And as their voices flowed into a crescendo she found herself off her feet and she wasn't the only one. They were all dancing, all singing, faces filled with smiles and laughter.

As the song ended, they all stopped, giggling and grinning at one another, a look of certainty on their faces.

'Everyone, I think you know we've found our closing number', Mr Schue said, looking similarly elated. 'Now, is anyone else feeling like an ice cream?' The cheer that went up at his words was very enthusiastic and they found themselves piling into cars and trucks, heading down to the local Dairy Queen, windows down so the sunshine could come in.

Half an hour later, they were spread over a couple of tables, sharing jokes, laughter and general good humour. Rachel couldn't remember a time when they'd been so united; when she'd been part of something like this. She held the moments carefully in her mind, trying to preserve them perfectly.

'Rachel!' Quinn's voice startled her out of her reverie. 'Rachel! My waters have broken!'


	6. Fresh Leaf Part I

**A/N:** Well, for the time being, it looks like my muse is here to stay - it's very exciting, I have to say. ANYWAY, this means I have words pouring out of my finger tips like the rain here in the UK (ironically, it's not raining as I write this).

This chapter is the first part of two. I started out to write a chapter about everyone moving on with their lives after Quinn had the baby, but actually the baby sort of ended up stealing my brain (plot bunny baby! gasp!) and so this is in two parts so you don't have one massive beast of a chapter. I was looking at something like 6,000 words in a chapter and personally, I don't feel like having a monster chapter like that. Sorry!

Righto, so thanks to anyone who favourited this story. I hope you like this next bit - Puckleberry fluffiness abides! Honestly, I got a bit sentimental writing this; sorry if that's not your thing.

Enjoy! And please review! It makes my Puckleberries grow faster :)

* * *

**Turning Over a Fresh Leaf Part I**

At Quinn's announcement, the babble of chatter and laughter on their tables was silenced. In a heartbeat, Jesse was at Quinn's side, holding her hand and asking how she felt. Rachel found herself unable to move, frozen in place like the events unfolding in front of her were in a film, not happening in real life. Turning to look at Noah, she found his face full of pure, unadulterated emotion – fear. Reaching for his hand, she squeezed it gently, breaking his reverie and somehow sending herself back into reality. Standing up, she slipped easily into her role of leader and began snapping out instructions, taking charge of the situation.

'Right, Quinn, you come and sit down over here. Jesse, you sit with her and keep her as calm as possible. Mike, if you could get your truck and bring it as close to the doors as possible. Brittany, if you could go with him and let us know when he's here.' She took a deep breath, thinking fast. 'Mercedes, if you could get on the phone to the hospital and let them know we're on our way. Tell them we've got a pregnant woman on our way; her waters have just broken and she's two weeks before her due date. Make a fuss if you have to.' She saw Mercedes nod and knew her friend would be on it. Everyone was looking at her with wide, hopeful, expectant eyes and she felt the weight of their faith pressing heavily on her.

Noah's hand landed on her shoulder, reassuring and strengthening. She turned to look at him and he smiled comfortingly. She returned a small smile of her own, knowing that if he could be this tough she could be too. She took another deep breath and let it out in a gusty sigh. 'Mr Schue, I need you to organise everyone in getting to the hospital. I'll try and keep everyone updated as to where we are and how things are going before we get to the hospital via text.' Quinn gave a gasp of pain and everyone looked at her, gripping Jesse's hand with white knuckles.

'It hurts, ok?' Unsurprisingly, the blonde did not look happy. Seeing everyone freeze, Rachel took charge again.

'Come on everybody! Stop stalling and start acting!' Turning to Mercedes, who'd just reappeared, she asked: 'What's the news on the hospital?' Her fellow diva smiled.

'They weren't very helpful, so I had them put me through to my aunt Loretta. She's a midwife. She's taking care of things.' Rachel sighed with relief. At that moment, Brittany bounded through the door.

'Mike's out front, ready to go when you are.' Again, everyone was thrown into panic, like ants in an anthill that had been kicked.

'Everyone **calm down!**' Rachel shouted to make herself heard above the noise. 'Right. Noah, Jesse, if the pair of you could make a chair of your hands for Quinn that will save her walking to the car. I'll follow you in a minute.' Nobody seemed to question that she would be going in Mike's truck with the others. Turning to the rest of the group, she fixed them all with a hard stare. 'I need you all to be organised and sort out who is travelling in which car. We can always come back and pick up some of the cars later if we need to. Right now, the important thing is being at the hospital for Quinn.' She paused, and then looked at Mr Schue. 'Ring Shelby please. I think she ought to be there.' He nodded, briefly while everyone else looked at them blankly. Then she left hurrying out to the car and hopping into the front seat next to Mike, checking on Puke, Quinn and Jesse in the backseat. 'Let's go', she said firmly, not showing how nervous she was.

* * *

The car journey was tense, and even the arrival at the hospital did nothing to dispel the knot in her stomach. She looked at Noah, whose face was set like stone, shoulders rigid, mouth grimly clamped as if to prevent him from letting his fear show. Her heart ached seeing him like that and she wished there was something she could do to help him. _That's the trouble being a leader_, she thought sadly. _Everyone always wants you – you don't always have time for the people who really matter_. Quietly, she laid a hand on his shoulder and when he turned to look at her, she planted a soft kiss on his lips.

'We'll get through this. All of us; I promise you Noah.' His shoulders relaxed slightly and he pulled her back down to him for another kiss.

'Thanks Rach.' He scooped her into his lap as they sat in the waiting room. 'I don't know what I'd do without you here right now.' She snuggled into him, wrapping her arms around him and holding him tightly, as much to anchor herself into reality as to show him she was there. He buried his face in her hair and they clung to each other until they were told they were allowed to go to the room Quinn was in.

* * *

Three hours later, Noah, Rachel, Quinn, Mr Schue and Shelby Corcoran sat in the same room all with similarly anxious expression on their faces.

'The last thing we want is for you to feel like you're being forced into this because the baby has come early', Shelby said seriously. 'We only want you to give us your little girl if you're completely comfortable with the idea.' Mr Schue nodded.

'And...' He looked at Shelby, who nodded. 'We've discussed this between ourselves; we've decided that we'd like to have an open adoption, if you do decide to let us have her.' He looked earnestly at Noah and Quinn. 'We feel it's important you're a part of this baby's life – you are her parents after all. We think she deserves to know the people who gave her life; to know where she came from. And we think **you **deserve a chance to show her all the love you obviously have for her.'

Quinn's eyes overflowed with tears, trickling silently down her cheeks. Rachel laid a gentle hand on hers and the blonde smiled at her.

'I'm not sad', she said, reassuring her friend. 'I'm...happy. I never thought an opportunity like this would happen.' She took a deep, shaky breath. 'I never admitted it, but I couldn't stand the thought of not being able to see what happened to my baby.' She choked back a sob, then broke down in Rachel's arms. Puck looked similarly emotional, blinking furiously and breathing shallowly.

'Mr Schue, you're a legend', he said in a strangled voice, allowing himself to be pulled into a fierce hug. When they pulled apart, neither man had dry eyes and Rachel found herself welling up at the sight. She same the look on her mother's face.

'God, look at us', she said, laughing through her tears. 'Do you think Quinn's hormones are catching?' Everyone laughed, a spirit of genuine happiness filling the room. Then Quinn looked at Puck, who merely nodded. She looked back to Shelby and Mr Schue.

'She's yours', was all she said. Then the tears began anew, born of a joy so strong it was almost unbearable. They were smiling, laughing, crying and hugging one another like some kind of miracle was taking place. _I guess one is_, Rachel though as Puck grabbed her and pulled her in for a long, slow kiss that warmed her to the core of her being. They broke apart and the smile he gave her lit up his face.

'I love you', he said tenderly. She drew back, eyes wide and heart racing. 'I mean it', he said meeting her gaze. 'I love you and I think I have for a while now.' Then he whispered in her ear. 'One day, it'll be you in that bed, squeezing out my kid. And when that happens, not even god is taking my child from me.' She caught her breath, hardly able to speak. The certainty in his voice touched something deep inside her and she realised: _this is the man I will spend my life with_.

'Our child, Noah. Not just yours', she said with a smile.

* * *

After another three hours, Quinn was sweating, panting and red in the face. Mr Schue and Shelby had left the room, with Jesse taking their places. Now he stood by Quinn's side, holding her hand and saying soothing things to her. Puck and Rachel stood on her other side, Rachel holding Quinn's hand and Puck holding her hand as if she was the only thing holding him in place.

'She's fully dilated now and I can see the tip of the baby's head', the midwife said. She was Mercedes' aunt Loretta; a large black woman with a comforting manner. She looked up at Quinn. 'I need you to really push now Quinn. Just give in to what your body is telling you when I say so ok?'

'I want to push **now**', the pretty blonde said, teeth gritted. 'It fricking hurts!'

'I know honey, but if you push too hard too soon, there may be some tearing. And trust me, you don't want that.' The thought seemed to scare Quinn enough to make her compliant and she listened carefully to everything Loretta said, squeezing Rachel and Jesse's hands with a vice-like grip as she co-ordinated her pushes.

Then, after what seemed like an eternity, she gave a great whimpering sigh and Loretta said:

'She's here! Your baby girl is here!' And suddenly there was a tiny, disgusting looking baby covered in blood and some thick, white, mucus like substance. Rachel felt Puck recoil and stifled a laugh. Quinn started to laugh from sheer, exhausted relief and then they all joined in, somewhat hysterical as Loretta and her assistants cleaned up the baby and clamped the umbilical cord. They passed her to Quinn, who sniffed back her tears and held her in trembling arms. The three of them crowded round the mother and child.

'She's beautiful', Puck said with awe, his eyes filled with pride.

'She should be, with the pair of you as parents', Jesse said, earning a grin from Puck and a blush from Quinn.

'What will you call her?' Rachel asked, her voice hushed as they regarded their little miracle. Quinn looked up at Puck.

'Noah?' His eyes grew wide at her using his name. 'Do you have any ideas?' He took a deep breath.

'Well, at first, when I found out we were having a girl, I thought about Abigail. It's a Jewish name and it means 'Father is rejoicing' or 'Father's joy'. It seemed appropriate', he said looking down at his daughter. 'But now...now I think we should call her Amy.'

'Why Amy?' Quinn said softly.

'It means 'Beloved'. And that's what she will be, by all of us.' Rachel's heart squeezed painfully in her chest. She looked at Quinn, whose eyes were misty.

'I like that name', she said with a smile. 'Amy it is.'

* * *

As was expected, the rest of Glee poured into the room to see little Amy the next morning, followed by Shelby and Mr Schue, whose eyes filled with tears when they saw the tiny girl who would be theirs in time. Everyone was silenced by her beauty and her size – she seemed to be fashioned in a perfect miniature of normal sized people but she was so **small** that it was fascinating to look at her. Rachel's breath caught every time she saw the girl and thought about how she would one day be having children of her own like that. It was an idea she embraced.

Ironically, Noah seemed to have gone into denial about the whole idea of having children or sex ever again.

'Rach, did you **see** how scary that shit was? I mean, Quinn was going all she-Hulk on our asses and then the baby was all disgusting when it came out of her...' His face went white. 'I'm never going to be able to put little Puck anywhere near any woman's, y'know, again without seeing that.' He took a shaky breath. 'There will be no more Puckerone loving for anyone ever again. I'm gonna become a hermit and live a life of chastity.' He looked at his tiny girlfriend, his eyes full of sadness. 'Babe, sex has been ruined for me. Sorry.'

'Noah, you're being ridiculous', she replied. 'Give it a few days and I guarantee you'll be back to your usual filthy self.' He shook his head and she glared at him. 'Do you not love Amy? Is that it?'

'I **love **her! This is my kid we're talking about Rach. How could you say that?'

'Because that formerly "disgusting" baby is your cute little girl and the same will happen with any other children you have in future. Besides-', here she stopped and whispered a suggestion in his ear. 'And if you never have sex again, we'll **never** have sex.' His expression changed and he smirked.

'Well we can find a closet now if you like', he said with a wink and she laughed, falling into his open arms for a hug.

'I love you too, Noah Eli Puckerman', she said with a smile, kissing him. He smiled down at her and she felt like they were walking on sunshine as they went, hand in hand, to look at little Amy in the nursery.

'Your little girl is beautiful Puck.' Mr Schue stood beside them, watching the baby with a glow of joy surrounding him and making him look younger. Noah looked down at Rachel, as if searching for reassurance. She nodded at him, giving his hand a gentle squeeze.

'It's just Noah now, Mr Schue. And **your** little girl is beautiful. This is my little niece.' Mr Schue's eyes filled with tears and he drew a shaky breath.

'I spoke to Quinn about a middle name for her. We thought the pair of you should be the ones to name her. She said she thought Abigail would be good, but she thinks you should pick a name as well. So tell me Noah, what's her name?' Noah's eyes went misty as he realised what Quinn was doing and for a moment he pulled Rachel close to him, just holding her. She soothed him as best she could, knowing his self-control was hanging by a thread. Then he took a deep breath and released her.

'Her name is Amy Abigail Bonnie Schuester.' He smiled. 'It means she's called beloved, Father's joy and pretty; all the things she is.' Mr Schue nodded, a smile mirroring Noah's own.

'I think it's perfect.'

'So do I.' Shelby joined them. 'You've chosen well Noah. Thank you.' Rachel felt like her heart burst, seeing the love shining between them all. Then her mother said something that made her realise just how blessed the little baby in the nursery was.

'Amy's going to have a wonderful childhood, I just know it.' She looked at Noah. 'She has us, an extra special aunt and uncle and ten honorary aunts and uncles. Nobody could ask for more love than that.'

* * *

Later that day, they christened her in their own way. There would be a proper ceremony in a month or two, once the adoption had been finalised, but they all knew that was merely a formality. This was the thing that mattered as they all crowded into Quinn's room, watching her holding the little dark-haired girl in her arm, her face serene and happy, Jesse by her side.

The song was hastily prepared and not word perfect, but it was wonderful in itself. There was so much love in the song that the room seemed to be running out of air. Rachel felt a little light headed as they joined in the first chorus, voices swelling as they all sang together.

_When I hold you in my arms,  
And look back on my charmed life;  
My charmed life.  
I hope, I hope if nothing more  
That one day you'll call your life  
A charmed life.  
_

Noah took the first verse, looking contented and happy as he sung to his "niece" who looked at them with wide, unfocused eyes.

_Well I never really worried that much  
About making lots of money and such  
And I always seemed to land on my feet.  
Though there's been some difficult times  
The good times where never far behind  
I snatched all of my victories from the jaws of defeat_

_When I hold you in my arms,_  
_And look back on my charmed life_  
_My charmed life._  
_I hope, I hope if nothing more_  
_That one day you'll call your life_  
_A charmed life._

Then the rest of them faded to let Mr Schue sing, his voice filled with emotion and his face softened by tenderness and love as he sang to his new daughter and Shelby. Unsurprisingly, nobody minded him dating Shelby or minded that she was Rachel's mother. Somehow, it was as if little Amy had cast a spell over them all that made everyone loving and forgiving.

_Well the course of true love never ran smooth_  
_They broke my heart, and I broke theirs too_  
_And breaking up was so very hard to do_  
_But I knew I'd find the one_  
_And sure enough she came along_  
_And not long after that along came you_

Noah, Mr Schue and Jesse sung the last verse together, their voices making a beautiful wall of sound.

_Well sometimes this life is like being afloat  
On a raging sea in a little row boat  
Just trying not to be washed overboard  
But if you take your chances and you ride your luck  
And you never, never, never, never, never give up  
Well those waves will see you safely to a friendly shore  
_

And as they came together to sing the last chorus as a choir, softly and carefully, little Amy's face split into a big, toothless smile. She chuckled happily and it was at that moment that Rachel knew this little girl was going to be someone very special.

_When I hold you in my arms,  
I know that this is a charmed life  
A charmed life._

Then she spoke for all of them. 'Welcome to the world, Amy Abigail Bonnie Schuester. We hope you have a charmed life.'


	7. Fresh Leaf Part II

**A/N:** Hello again! I know, I am a horrible, bad person who should not be allowed to write fanfic on account of being HORRENDOUS at updating. Anyway, here's the next part of the last chapter, which is a bit less preggers and a bit more lezzers (no offence meant). See if you can guess...

Thank yous to anyone who reviewed or supported this story - MUCH appreciated.

Reviews are utter love and make me squee insanely :)

* * *

**Fresh Leaf Part II**

Time seemed to disappear over the next week. Officials came and went from Quinn's hospital room as the rest of Glee club sat around and waited for updates. Soon, it was over and then the day came when Mr Schue and Shelby walked out of the room together, Mr Schue with Amy in his arms, looking down at her like she was the most precious thing in the world. They all crowded round, wishing them well and reaching out to the little girl who'd already stolen a place in their hearts. Rachel hung back, unable to keep the tears from her eyes. She knew that whatever she and Shelby would have, it would not be the same as what little Amy would have even though their bond was not one of blood. She was struggling to keep her lips steady when a strong arm slipped around her, pulling her into a muscular body. She leant against him, slotting against him perfectly, as if they were made that way.

'She still loves you sweetheart', he said softly. She nodded, unable to look up at him, for fear she would break down. He turned, hugging her and holding her until she felt able to breathe without choking on the lump in her throat. She saw Shelby looking at her and she nodded once, trying on a smile. Her mother smiled back at her, then turned away, walking down the corridor with Mr Schue and their new daughter. She took a deep breath, straightened her shoulders and lifted her head.

'Let's get away from here.' The voice was Quinn's standing in the doorway of her room in jeans and a loose top. 'I'm sick of the lights and the smell. I want to go somewhere that feels like it's real. I don't mind if we just go to the auditorium and practice.'

'My dads are out this afternoon', Rachel said. 'We could get takeout and watch movies.' Puck looked at her, surprised.

'Rach, are you ok? I've never seen you turn down the chance to practice.' She shrugged, looking up at him and stretching to plant a soft kiss on his cheek.

'I think maybe it would be good for us all to take a break for a day. It's been a really tough week and we can't do anything if we're exhausted. Even the best performers know that.'

'She's right', Jesse said. 'We don't want to push ourselves too hard – even Vocal Adrenaline have scheduled down time.' He smiled at Rachel. 'I think it sounds great – so long as we don't have to watch Barbra all afternoon.' She giggled, shaking her head.

'No, no Barbra, I promise.' She turned to the rest of the group. 'Everyone's welcome and if any of you want to grab some DVDs or something, that's ok. But if you'd rather not, I still think we should spend this afternoon doing something relaxing, regardless of if it's together or apart.' People nodded and slowly, they all moved out of the hospital. Rachel, Noah, Quinn and Jesse brought up the rear, with Jesse carrying Quinn's bag.

'I'm just going to go home and have a shower', Quinn said. 'So I'll catch up with you at your house ok Rach?'

'Sure Q. See you guys there.' Jesse and Quinn walked back to his car and Noah looked at her.

'How did you know he'd go with her?' he asked. She smiled at him.

'He loves her and she feels the same. I think they just need to have a little time together before we go back to normal life.' He raised an eyebrow at her and she shrugged. 'Look I don't know _what_ they're going to do and frankly I think you're disgusting for even thinking about it, but it's none of our business regardless.' He leered at her and she smacked him. 'Pervert. Come on, we need to get to mine before everyone else.'

He laughed and pulled her in for a kiss, silencing any other protest she might have had. Then, he picked her up and threw her over his shoulder, carrying her kicking and screaming to the car.

* * *

The afternoon was spent peacefully; everyone sprawled on her living room floor watching rubbishy films like 'Bride Wars' and 'Galaxy Quest'. There were boxes and containers scattered everywhere with half a dozen different kinds of food in them – it turned out that nobody could agree on just one sort of takeout, so there was Chinese, Italian, Mexican, some tapas, some sushi, Indian and even just some burgers. Rachel sat on the sofa snuggled into Noah's side and feeling sleepy but watching happily as her friends enjoyed themselves. Kurt had brought the reason for his blushes along and she was glad. Blaine seemed like a nice boy and it was good for him to become part of what they were, even if he was the 'competition'.

At the other end of the sofa Quinn and Jesse were talking quietly, both of them lit by some inner happiness. She smiled to see them, knowing from Quinn the details of what had happened that afternoon. Noah had begged her to tell him, claiming he knew what it was but she just refused, replying that it wasn't what he thought and if he was so into the idea of new mothers having sex he should go and spend some time on Google. He'd been speechless for about thirty seconds after she said that, then burst out laughing.

'I knew it!' he'd said. 'I've corrupted you.' She smacked him and said that he was nothing but a bad influence but he'd pressed her up against the kitchen counter and kissed her until they were both breathless. It had been hard to tear themselves away from each other, but at that point a polite cough from Tina had interrupted them. Blushing, Rachel had wormed her way out from between Noah and the counter, making her way to the lounge and trying to pretend they _hadn't_ been gone for the last quarter of an hour.

Now, she snuggled closer to him, slipping into his lap, hearing the rhythmic beating of his heart and feeling the steady rise and fall of his chest as he breathed. His fingers tangled gently in her hair, rubbing her scalp as '17 Again' played, with Mike, Matt and Sam arguing fiercely over what exercise routine Zac Efron used to get his body into shape. Mercedes was chatting to Blaine and Kurt, while Tina and Artie discussed some new video-editing software that was apparently used in the film. Rachel ignored them all and inhaled deeply, soaking in Noah's scent. Then a thought struck her.

'Noah, where's Brittany? I haven't seen her in half an hour.' Her boyfriend shrugged.

'She went out. She'd said she'd be back in a bit. She looked a little nervy, but maybe she had some errand or something.' As if on cue, the doorbell rang and Rachel sat up, her former feelings of sleepiness fading with every second.

'That could be her now', she said, intrigued. 'I'll go and get the door.' She hopped of the sofa, hearing Noah get up behind her, his arm wrapping around her. She leaned against him gratefully, always happy to have him close. She opened the door and saw Brittany standing on the porch, looking uncomfortable.

'Come on in', she said with a smile. 'I was just wondering where you'd got to.' The blonde cheerleader looked even more awkward, shuffling her feet.

'Don't be mad Rachel. I don't want some mad Jewish lady cursing me or anything like that movie with the goat and the nosebleed.' Rachel was confused, not having a clue – as usual- what Brittany was on about.

'Chill Brittany', Puck said with a chuckle. 'Rachel's way too hot to go all ape-shit on your ass for starters and I'm pretty sure Mrs Ganush wasn't Jewish ok? So nobody's going to go all 'Drag Me to Hell', don't worry.' Brittany looked at Rachel, her eyes wide.

'It's ok Brittany', she said reassuringly. 'I promise not to be angry.' The blonde cheerleader nodded and took a deep breath.

'I need to tell you something all of you. Just not yet. I'm waiting for someone and I don't think you're going to be very happy to see them but I need you to. Please don't be angry ok?' A feeling of unease crept into Rachel's stomach and she looked up at her boyfriend. He smiled down at her before leaning to kiss her on the nose.

'If it's who I think it is, you won't be happy sweetheart. But Britt means well.' She thought hard for a moment, then decided to trust him.

'Ok. Come in while you're waiting. I'm not going to flip out on you, no matter who it is.' Brittany walked in, her fingers twitching as she walked to the lounge. Everyone greeted her cheerfully but her smile was half-hearted and a frown appeared on Quinn's face. She raised an eyebrow at the tall blonde and nodded as some indecipherable message passed between them.

'What's going on Noah?' Rachel whispered. 'And why does Quinn seem to be in the know as well? Is this some conspiracy against me or something?' He smiled.

'Calm down ok? Nobody's plotting against you. It just happen to be a case of some of us having insider info. Now be quiet and let things unfold.' She was about to retort sharply when Brittany spoke.

'I love Glee. I really do. I mean, everyone knows I'm more awesome than all of you put together and I should be leading this thing but we love each other anyway.' Rachel rolled her eyes. Brittany really was a as crazy as a bag of cats sometimes. 'The thing is, I realised that even if I do something maybe not so awesome, you'll all be cool with it.' The tall cheerleader took a deep breath. 'So anyway, I was looking at everyone today and I was thinking. We all love Quinn even though she cheated on her boyfriend and got knocked up and now she's with Jesse who has Elvis hair which creeps me out. And we love Puck even though he's kind of a douche and he's slushied almost everyone here and put people in dumpsters.' She looked around. 'We love Kurt even though he dresses more like Lady Gaga than a man. He's here with his boyfriend today and nobody cares. Although', she said, looking at Blaine, 'I've never seen a hot gay guy like you before, so maybe he's just pretending to be nice.' Rachel saw that Noah was smothering a laugh and had to hide a giggle herself when she saw the appalled look on Kurt's face.

'I've been keeping a secret', Brittany said. 'A big one. I've been keeping it for a long time because I thought you guys would be mad and egg me or something if I told you. But then I remembered how awesome I am and I got it. This is important to me and I'm important to all of you, so I need to tell you. I'm in love. With someone.' Her words sparked looks of interest and curiosity and Mercedes whispered something into Kurt's ear. He turned to look at her, shocked, then seemed to mull the idea over and shrugged. 'Anyway', Brittany continued. 'I know this kind of sucks for all the guys because now none of you can sleep with me, but I want you to know. I know you love me and I want you to love them too. Because they matter to me. They really do.' Her phone buzzed and she pulled it out, a small smile stretched on to her lips. 'They're here', she announced. She walked out of the lounge and a minute later, she came back into the room. 'Don't judge ok?' she said softly, a pleading note in her voice. She looked over her shoulder and nodded, holding out her hand. Santana stepped out to take it, looking afraid and vulnerable.

'I love her. I know she's said some things and done some things that you don't like, but I love her and I promise you she's more than that.' Brittany shrugged. 'She's a bitch, I know. But she's funny and loyal and sweet to me. She looks out for me when nobody else does and she tells me I'm beautiful. I'd like you to give her a chance.' Then she was silent and there was nothing in the room but complete shock and confusion. Rachel felt like she was been spun around at high speed. She was struggling between anger and her promise to Brittany, as well as the clear bond between the two girls that made her feel soft inside.

'They really do love each other', Noah said to her softly. She looked up at him, eyes wide and head spinning. He smiled at her sadly. 'I know you're angry and I get it. The shit she pulled was _not_ kosher and she knows that, believe me. But Brittany's right. I've known Tana for a very long time and underneath the layers of complete bitch there's something good. She _is _loyal and if she's on your side she'll stick with you no matter what.' He shook his head. 'I'm not asking you to be her BFF and braid her hair – for starters the essence of hellbitch she uses for product might burn your hands – but give her a chance. For Brittany.' She sighed, feeling tired and worn out.

'Wasn't today meant to be about relaxing?' she muttered quietly. He raised an eyebrow and she blew out a breath. 'Alright, alright I'll try not to strangle her ok?'

'That's my girl', he said with a smile, pulling her in close for a hug. He kissed her lightly, taking her hand and giving it a squeeze, then they made their way over to where a crowd of people had gathered around the two cheerleaders. Rachel cleared her throat and eyeballed her fellow Glee-clubbers meaningfully. They moved out of the way quickly, leaving her path to Santana and Brittany free. The latina girl looked completely terrified and Rachel noticed Brittany giving her hand a quick squeezed. Santana looked at the taller girl who gave her a small smile and nodded. She nodded in return, turning to face Rachel again.

'I'm really sorry for everything I did to you', she said with seemingly genuine sincerity. 'I know I can't ever make up for it or take it back but I want you to know that anything I _can_ do to make you see I'm not that person any more, I'll do it, just name it.' She shook her head, looking down. 'I'm not proud of some of the things I've done to you or anyone else in this room. I'm not going to use my confusion about my...feelings as an excuse. All I can say is I wasn't myself. Well, not completely. I've always been a bitch to be honest.' She shrugged, her confidence seemingly somewhat restored, yet she could not meet Rachel's eyes.

'I have every reason to hate you. You got me drunk, then you slept with my boyfriend and you had the nerve to tell me you'd done me a favour.' She shook her head, her mouth wrinkled in disgust. 'You could have been under the influence of mind-altering drugs and I'd still think you were completely culpable. Thing is though, Brittany's right. Glee is about love –about loving ourselves and each other. And much as I'd like to rip out your guts and watch you bleed to death slowly, I won't because Brittany asked us to give you a chance and I promised her I would.' She looked Santana straight in the eye. 'If you ever try to pull shit like that with me or anyone that matters to me again, promise or no I will take you down myself. And don't think I don't know how – Noah's been teaching me a few things recently.' She took a deep breath and looked round at everyone. Her friends all looked completely gob-smacked; even more so than they had at Brittany's announcement. She smiled.

'Chill guys, I'm not going to nuclear on anyone's ass today.' She frowned and looked at her boyfriend. 'Noah Puckerman you are the _worst _influence on me. Honestly, you've made me sound like some flunkey who smokes weed and skateboards everywhere.' She shuddered. 'Regardless of what I may have just said, I will endeavour to do my best to be civil towards you and see what the "new you" is like', she said to Santana. 'I suggest everyone else should do the same, particularly if you intend to rejoin the New Directions. Anyway, there's at least two more films to watch and my dads won't be home 'til late so I think we should all sit back down and try to enjoy the rest of today ok?' Muttered assent met her words, with everyone looking at her a bit strangely, as if her body had been taken over by aliens. She smirked and settled herself back on the sofa, picking up the remote and hitting the play button. Noah came to join her and soon the others were scattered around the room again, talking and eating.

'Just so you know Rach, you're totally hot when you're going psycho', Noah whispered in her ear. 'I like you badass.' She raised an eyebrow at him, smiling.

'Just wait 'til tonight', she said slyly. 'If you think _this _was badass, you've got a treat in store.' Then she snuggled back up to him, enjoying how he shifted uncomfortably in his seat and the rapid beat of his pulse. _Maybe he's not such a bad influence after all_, she thought with a grin. _After all, he's proved to be a good teacher._

* * *

From that day onwards, it was if the slate had been wiped clean for all of them. Glee had a new voice and it wasn't just Santana sitting in the back row making snarky quips. It was as if that afternoon had recharged their batteries. They sang, danced and debated with new vigour, completely wowing Mr Schue. But even he seemed brighter and full of life. Noah put that down to the arrival of little Amy.

'You can totally tell he was born to be a dad', he said to Rachel one day. 'He just gives off that vibe and after Mrs Schue went all psycho with her "baby" he was completely gutted, you could just see it. Now...it's like his raison d'être has been restored and he's totally on it.' Rachel stared at him, amazed.

'Noah, that was one of the most deep and meaningful things I have ever heard you say that _wasn't_ related to me, drinking or COD. But I think you're right and I think it's not just him she's done that too – we're _all _different people now.' He smirked at her.

'Sweetheart I was born to surprise you', he said, before grabbing her hand and dragging her into a closet in one of the classrooms. And by the time they emerged, she'd forgotten to be angry with him.

* * *

The final days before regionals passed and then suddenly, before they realised, the competition was upon them. They packed into the bus, sitting in their pairs chatting about stupid things and all trying to pretend that they weren't utterly terrified. Rachel clung to Noah silently, wondering what was in store for them.


	8. I'm Still Winning

**A/N:** Once again, I'm SO sorry for being useless and not updating sooner. I had Puckleberry writer's block... Anyway, here's the next instalment, which - depending on what you all think/say - may be the last. It's a little shorter than previous and not my favourite chapter but I found this _really_ hard to write. Thoughts?

**I do not own any songs/tv shows in this. **I don't even own the quote "like Norah Jones wrapped in leather". Credit for that goes to Hecate's Rath, whose story 'Brick Wall' is beautiful. Go, read.

Thank you to my **FABOO** reviewers. You're all amazing. PLEASE, continue to tell me lovely things.

**AND REMEMBER**, it is **YOU **who decide whether I put an extremely Puckleberry centric epilogue on this or not. **Reviewreviewreview**.

* * *

**I'm Still Winning**

For the first time in her life, Rachel Berry was nervous. She knew she was nervous because although she'd never felt this way before, she recognised the symptoms; sweaty palms, knots in the stomach and fidgets, amongst other things. She found herself pacing back and forth in the green room, unable to sit still as she thought about all the things that could go wrong. What if she forgot the words? Or the steps? What if she opened her mouth and she couldn't sing?

'Rach, stop worrying,' As always, Noah's voice reached her like nothing else. 'Nothing's going to go wrong.' She smiled awkwardly at him and it helped to hear him say that, but for once, even his reassurance wasn't enough.

'I'll be right back', she said, dashing out to find the nearest bathroom. Maybe it would help if she threw up – even with no gag reflex she was pretty sure she'd manage to puke right now. She was half –running down the corridor when she heard footsteps behind her.

'Rachel, stop.' A strong arm grabbed her and pulled her into a doorway. The door slammed shut behind them and she found herself in...a janitor's closet. Unsurprisingly, she found herself staring up into Noah's green eyes, warm and caring. He stared down at her seriously, his arms forming a cage around her, her back pressed against the wall. 'You need to chill out. I know you're freaking out – I can see you going bat-shit crazy inside that ridiculously tiny head of yours. But you can quit worrying ok? Cause we're awesome – like kick-ass, unbeatable awesome. And you know that, deep down inside.' He sighed, shaking his head with a smile. 'Of all the times for you to lose that mega diva attitude of yours, now is _not_ the time.' He placed a lingeringly kiss on her lips. 'So I guess I'll just have to remind you of how incredible I think you are; how incredible I _know_ you are.' He kissed her again and she melted into him like she always did, the nervous energy in her body dissipating as warmth filled her.

He understood her like nobody else, knowing exactly which spot would make her squeal and squirm, or unconsciously moan and go limp in his arms. His lips were on her neck, sucking on a patch of skin that made her knees feel like they no longer contained bones. One hand was hot on the small of her back, keeping her flush with his body and – if she was honest – holding her up. The other was making its way under the layers of material and net that made up her skirt, trailing fingers up her thighs.

'Noah, we can't, not here', she mumbled, her breath hitching with every inch his hand moved upwards. 'Someone could walk in. Someone could _hear_.' He chuckled roughly in her ear, sending shivers down her spine.

'Who says anything about 'we'?' he told her, before kissing her and effectively silencing her. His fingers continued to trail up her thigh until they reached their destination and all her protests were cut short by the magic he worked, reducing her to incoherent babbling and heavy breathing. It was a little over ten minutes later that he removed his hand from her skirt, giving her a quick peck on the cheek and wiping his hand on a rag on some shelves next to them.

'Noah, that is _not_ hygienic', she managed to gasp out, although most her brain was floating somewhere in heaven, along with the entirety of her body. He chuckled again.

'Should I have licked them clean?' he said with a grin. She smacked him, but could not ignore the tingles of desire thought sent through her.

'Come on, we ought to get back', he said, knowing exactly the effect his words had on her. He took her hand, leading her back out into the corridor, looking down at her as they walked back to the green room. She was unusually subdued.

'Are you ok?' he asked, worried that his "miracle cure" hadn't had the desired effect. She looked up at him and smiled.

'I'm fine', she said quietly. 'Actually, I'm...incredible.' He smirked so widely that she had to punch him a few times before he stopped being so entirely obnoxious.

* * *

Waiting in the wings to go on stage, Rachel could not have felt further from her early attack of nerves. Although Noah's methods were unusual, she had to admit that he always had the right way to make her feel better – it just might not sound quite right to start with. Now, she breathed easily and instead of feeling scared, she was dying to start – to sing and show everyone exactly why _they_ deserved to win. She turned to smile at him as they were announced and then...then she was exactly where she was meant to be, in the spotlight.

'This is for everyone who's ever dreamed', she said into the microphone before going silent and listening as Quinn's voice swung into the first lines that she knew as well as her own face. They followed a pattern that was like a well-trodden path and when the rest of the girls joined them on stage for the chorus it raised a fierce pride in her. They were _perfect_ and in that moment, she defied anyone to tell them that they did not deserve to win; that they were the loser underdogs everyone assumed them to be.

Her voice soared and the pure joy of singing overtook her, telling her that everything was alright; this was what she was _born_ to do. As the song headed towards its end, her only regret was that it was not longer – that she didn't have more time to enjoy doing what she loved best. But then they were into the next song and the boys came on stage, leather jackets and brylcreemed hair making them look like they'd stepped out of a fifties diner to spin their girls around to a mash-up of 'Start Me Up' and 'Livin' On a Prayer'. She couldn't keep the smile off her, especially as the last notes played out and their closing number began.

Joy surged through her veins, sweeping her away as they danced and chanted. Sam and Quinn poured their voices into a harmony as smooth as cream that danced over the beat and had everyone in the room up and dancing. She could see the auditorium getting caught up in an anthem that was infectious and delightful. Her heart soared and in that moment, she was one with every person who found a smile on their face and glee (or was it "Glee"?) in their heart.

Their dance was beautiful unison, the chorus of their voices crescendo-ing to the point of fever pitch before breaking into the wild helter-skelter of the refrain. It was a pure, unadulterated high and she wasn't surprised that when it ended, deafening silence filled the room for long moments before the applause surged into existence. She was elated and she sensed she was not the only ones as they took their bow and filed off the stage in a babbling, bubbly mess.

Backstage, it was like someone had given them all happy gas.

'That was _incroyable_!' Kurt said, his face lit up like a Christmas tree. 'If those judges don't give us first place it's because they're tone deaf!'

'Preach it, mister', Mercedes said with a grin before they fell into a hug, jumping up and down and squealing in excitement. Nobody else was any different and even Mr Schue was laughing like a child, looking about ten years younger as he embraced all of them, offering congratulations and praise. Rachel wasn't sure that there weren't tears in his eyes, but Noah told her she must be mistaken – a badass like Mr Schue wouldn't cry.

It was no surprise when the judges read out their name in first place – it was almost inevitable after a win like that. As Kurt said, only the tone-deaf could have ignored that they were amazing and filled with a passion that other glee clubs simply did not have. Rachel wondered if even the unstoppable Vocal Adrenaline had this power. She thought not, but was willing to wait to Nationals to see. Besides, in the mean time, Noah clearly had plans to fill her time with...

* * *

It was more than a week later when any of them were capable of actually getting _anything_ done in Glee. Before that, they'd simply been filled with such sheer joy at winning that they spent most of their sessions chattering loudly or singing the kind of songs that made it impossible to do anything but get up and join in.

At last, Mr Schue brought them to order. 'Guys, you know as well as I do that we totally _smashed_ it at Regionals, but if we're going to kick Vocal Adrenaline's ass at Nationals' – he waited for the woops to die down before continuing, 'we still have to come up with a pretty awesome game plan. So I need you all to _focus_ and think really hard about ways we could get the edge...'

'I have an idea Mr Schue', a voice said from the back of the classroom. They turned to look at Santana, who sat in her usual position in the back row, pinky finger curled around Brittany's – their only really outward expression of their feelings. She smiled at the blonde beside her, love lighting her eyes. 'We have loads of incredible singers in Glee and it's awesome that we showcase their talents. But we _also_ have incredible dancers and I think maybe it's time we let them take the spotlight too. Mike and Brittany have sick moves – wouldn't it be a good idea to put them to use?' Brittany smiled back, placing a quick peck on her cheek.

'Thank you', she whispered to her girlfriend. The latina shrugged.

'I don't want anyone saying I don't look out for my baby girl', she said and Rachel had to fight a grin. Santana was still hardcore, even if she wasn't dating guys any more. Then another thought struck her.

'I have an idea too Mr Schue', she piped up. 'Santana's right – we should definitely make the most of our talents, both singing _and_ dancing. And that's why I think we should make use of some other vocal talents as well as pushing dancing to the fore.' She smiled, looked at the shocked faces around her. 'Maybe I'm sick or something, but I really think it's a good idea if I'm not doing a solo.'

It was several seconds before Mr Schue spoke. 'Well if you think that's what we should do, I guess we should pay attention.' He shook his head, as if unable to believe what he was hearing. 'I'll be holding auditions for anyone who's interested next Wednesday in the auditorium.' And with that, the matter was closed.

* * *

Two weeks later and they had their programme for Nationals sorted. Rachel was pleased with their choices and strangely, almost pleased _not_ to be stealing the limelight for once. When she expressed this view to Noah, he laughed so hard he came close to choking. When he finally regained some breath, he explained it to her.

'Rach, it's called being part of a team.' And for the first time, she felt like she really understood.

So as she stood in the wings, listening to Mercedes smash her ballad to pieces, she felt only contentment and pride in a job well done. Sam and Quinn's duet made it hard to speak, feeling the love between them all as they told of love and happiness – it was a song for lovers and yet, standing there in New York surrounded by her friends, Rachel couldn't help but wonder if it wasn't about all of them too. She also couldn't help but wonder if Jesse wasn't going to be a more than a little jealous – Quinn and Sam acted well together and their chemistry was undeniable. But the sweet look the couple shared when the blonde took her place beside Jesse before their third song abolished any doubt.

Still, Rachel barely had any time to think about jealousy or chemistry before they moved into their final number and Santana's voice rang out. She'd been truly surprised when the latina had auditioned, but she couldn't deny her talent and that her voice was perfectly suited to a song made famous by Amy Winehouse. Her voice was, to quote something she'd heard somewhere, "like Norah Jones wrapped in leather". It was husky and even harsh at times but sexy and strong too – Rachel made a mental note to get her to sing more often in future. She sang 'Valerie' with great gusto and when the performance was over and they'd all gone backstage, a certain pint-sized diva couldn't help but think they'd put on a pretty good show.

* * *

It seemed the judges agreed with her. Mr Schue went to check the results as they stood in a nervous huddle, watching Vocal Adrenaline eye them arrogantly from across the room, cocksure and confident. They weren't so sure of themselves when the New Directions burst into an absolute furore of shouting, squealing and shrieking. In fact, they looked utterly defeated when they took their turn to look at the board and saw that they placed...second, behind a certain underdog Glee Club from Ohio who nobody had expected to get past Sectionals.

Rachel thought that was the best moment of her life, whirling around in Noah's arms as pure adrenaline raced through her system, giving her an intense high as she savoured the complete delight of _winning_.

The only thing that would change her mind would be a few days later, when her dads left her the house for the weekend and she happened to tell her boyfriend. Of course, he blew all her expectations out of the window and made her feel like she was the most beautiful woman in the world; like the _only_ woman in the world.

'Told you it'd be worth the wait', he said to her afterwards, a cocky grin plastered all over his face. The fact that she didn't speak or slap him only cemented the belief he was right. And forever after, he never let her forget that he had legitimately made her speechless.


	9. Tomorrow Is Another Day

**A/N:** It's been a LONG ride since this baby started, over a year ago and even longer since 'An Anomaly' kicked off this idea. I've had a ball writing it and even more fun reading everyone's lovely reviews. Anyway, this little piece of nostalgia is my parting to you and myself. And then that's it; the end. I hope you like it.

Thank you to everyone who's ever reviewed 'An Anomaly' or 'Learning to Love' and to anyone who favourited or subscribed. You are inspirational.

To happy endings and new beginnings...

* * *

**Tomorrow Is another Day**

Two years later and it seemed like yesterday that they were standing on the stage at Nationals, singing for a victory that nobody had expected them to win. A lot had changed since then. They'd taken the title for the second time this year, glad to be back in first place after the disastrous events of their last attempt – two words: food poisoning – and leaving McKinley on a high note. Now, they could leave as winners, with something to be proud of. Santana would take care of anyone who said otherwise.

Rachel stood in the girls' bathroom, looking at her reflection and thinking about all the times she'd come in here to cry, or wipe slushies off her face. She'd spent a lot of time here over the years, although not nearly so much recently, yet somehow she was quite fond of the place – even the pornographic drawings that still lingered on the doors. Quinn had tried to get them off, but she _had_ used a Sharpie and it seemed to be true that they _never_ wiped away.

'Oh hey Rach.' _Speak of the devil_, she thought with a smile as Quinn walked through the door.

'Hey Q – are you excited?' Two and a half years of friendship had brought them as close as sisters and it was Rachel's main sadness that they'd be so far apart after this. No more girly nights in, or shopping trips or gossiping sessions over hot chocolate and cookies. _I guess we'll just have to Skype a lot_.

'Like you would not believe', the blonde said, her face lighting up with a smile. 'We're finally getting out of this town! It's like a dream come true.' She came and stood beside her friend at the sinks, looking at her flawless reflection in the mirror. 'I'm going to miss it, of course I am, but it's time to move on.' She smiled again, gesturing at their surroundings. 'It's not like we want to stay in high school forever, stuck with these crappy toilets and this _horrible_ fluorescent lighting. Besides, where you're headed, it's all soft lighting around mirrors so you can do your makeup before bursting out on to some Broadway stage and wowing the critics!'

'Not yet Q', Rachel said with a laugh. 'Just because I'm going to Julliard doesn't mean I'm headed for Broadway.' Quinn rolled her eyes.

'Stranger things have happened! I mean, look at Santana and Brittany. Or you forgiving Finn! Or _Lauren Zizes_ joining the Glee club.' She laughed. 'Give yourself a little more credit.' Rachel laughed with her, thinking on her words.

Finn had returned to Glee in junior year as a changed man, which Rachel attributed to a number of factors. First was the introduction of a father-figure into his life, in the shape of Burt Hummel. Then came Burt's heart attack and Kurt's complete breakdown as a result. After Burt's recovery, Kurt had begged the Glee club to let Finn back in – if not for Finn's sake, for Kurt's. Recognising Kurt's need for support, they'd agreed and to Rachel's surprise, things had been relatively easy. Finn was sincerely apologetic for his actions and was a gentleman towards her even without Noah threatening him. In fact, everything worked out so well the club wound up singing at Burt and Carole's wedding – a joyous, beautiful day that had them all feeling warm and sappy for days afterwards. And while at times Rachel found herself thinking back to that night with Finn, she knew that actually, having him in Glee was the right thing to do. He fitted there.

Lauren Zizes had been, if anything, more a surprise. She turned up one day after freeing Artie from a porta potty, with no explanation. She hadn't given one since then, but she was strong-willed and as Noah would put it "badass" so nobody dared to ask. Besides, any edition to their little "band of brother" was good, especially when their newest member was one who made the football team cower and get out of the way. She certainly had a lot to do with the new-found respect they'd begun to receive over the last year or so.

Brittany and Santana continued to date throughout junior and senior year – as far as Rachel was aware, they weren't planning on breaking up with one another any time soon, if ever. They were both "out" as bi-sexual now, commanding even more respect and awe than before if anything. Rachel had no idea how they did it, but they made a cute couple so she tended to leave them to it. And if she was honest, even if Noah was Santana's "homeboy" she still didn't think that would keep the latina from kicking her ass if she wanted to.

She sighed, checking herself over in the mirror one last time. 'I suppose we ought to head outside', she said to Quinn. 'The last thing we want to do is turn up late and make fools of ourselves – I want this to be as good as ait can be.' The blonde nodded.

'Sue threatened to lock and slow students inside school', she said. 'I think you're right.' She smiled, practically shining with happiness. 'I can't believe we're actually leaving!' She hugged the smaller girl impulsively. 'Come on Rach, let's go graduate!' Rachel laughed, taking the outstretched hand and running outside with her friend, towards the end of an era.

* * *

Noah Puckerman watched his tiny girlfriend on stage with a surge of pride. She looked cool and composed as she shook hands with Principal Figgins, her hair and makeup immaculate. She smiled brightly as she looked at the crowd and he felt his heart squeeze, knowing just how much this day meant to her. She might not have been as vocal about it as Quinn, but he knew she was every bit as thrilled to be leaving Lima and making her own way in life. Besides, if there was any place Rachel Berry belonged, it was New York City.

Her dreams were the reason he'd started pool-cleaning again in the summer after sophomore year. He'd done it last year too, working a lot harder for his money than previously – cougars didn't tip as well when you weren't sleeping with them too. But he'd saved up enough to hire a tutor on the sly and for the last two years he'd been working his ass off to try and get a scholarship. He was pretty sure it was all worth it when he told Rachel he'd been studying architecture in New York.

He wasn't sure how he'd decided on that career, but he supposed it called to something deep inside him – a need to do something with his life; to make a mark on his surroundings. And although he'd never admit it, he liked knowing that once he'd finished his degree, he'd have a career that could keep a family comfortably. He didn't want to be like his father.

He watched Quinn go up on stage and share a small grin with Rachel. He chuckled quietly to himself. The pair of them were thick as thieves now; Quinn was even in the process of trying to persuade Rachel to try out for Cheerleading at Julliard, if they offered such a thing. They were inseparable and that was another reason he'd decided to go to New York. It was bad enough that she'd be without her best friend, but if she'd been without him, she'd not sure she would have made it. She was fragile underneath the opinions and loud exterior – he didn't want the loneliness putting an end to her dreams.

Then it was his name being called and he couldn't help but feel a little nervous as he climbed on to the stage, towards Figgins who was smiling benignly. He felt his palms get sweaty and his stomach tie itself in knots. He felt a desperate urge to run. But then he caught Rachel's eye, seeing her little nod of reassurance and instantly he relaxed because he knew everything was going to be ok.

* * *

They ended up out by the lake, all the "old guard", gown and caps thrown aside, pretty dresses and suits changed for jeans, t-shirts and boots. Puck had, unsurprisingly, managed to get hold of alcohol and nobody escaped his killer punch. Pleasantly buzzed, they sat around laughing and reminiscing over old days. Looking around, Quinn felt a warm glow.

She wasn't the same person, she knew that, but she wasn't sad. She'd lost some things, gained others and grown into someone that she actually _liked_. She had a best friend who she loved like a sister and a group of people who accepted her. And, as she looked around, she wondered if maybe she might have something more than that.

She and Jesse broke up very amicably the summer before senior year. They'd survived more than most, having made it through her pregnancy and the long distance thing after Jesse graduated. But as his first year at Julliard finished and junior year came to a close, they both agreed that things had changed; the passion had faded and really, they were better off as friends.

Quinn had then spent senior year happily single, although not without offers. She'd turned them down, choosing to focus on herself for the year and enjoying having her own space. So she'd been as surprised as everyone else when she accepted Sam Evan's invitation to Prom. Of course, she'd made it clear that she only wanted to go as friends, yet deep inside she knew this wasn't quite the truth. He was a sweet, kind, nerdy boy with abs like an Adonis and the ability to make her laugh for no reason. He had the habit of doing ridiculously adorable things that she couldn't ignore, but most of all, he could sing. They'd done duets before and their voices mingled like milk and honey; she felt like he understood her completely.

Sam smiled at her from across the bonfire they'd made and she could feel like blush on her cheeks as she looked down, smiling to herself. He was going to California too – they'd even be on the same campus. They had time.

* * *

The Glee club met up a few times that summer, but it was no surprise that full-scale reunions weren't a regular occurrence. Things were changing and everyone had preparations to make. They'd all promised to meet up one last time though and they ended up in Breadstix, sprawling out over several tables and pretty much taking over the restaurant. Then, once everyone was so full they could hardly stand – and Santana had smuggled around two pounds of breadsticks into her bag – they poured out, heading to the lake again.

Rachel could feel the echoes of graduation night washing over her as they built a fire. Then she sat between Noah's legs, resting against his chest and staring into the flames as the conversation flowed and they all savoured one another's company for what could well be the last time.

'We should have a reunion', someone said. 'Like, organise something for a date five years down the line maybe, or even ten years.' Rachel shook her head.

'No, I don't think so', she said quietly. Everyone looked at her, confused. She shrugged. 'We shared something amazing together and you all know how grateful we all are for that. But that time is past now; we're moving on to something new and we have to let this part of our lives go. If we meet up, we'll just be busy assessing each other on how successful we are, or how good we look – we'll be stuck on the superficial and forget what really matters. And that's the fact that we did something wonderful, beating everyone's expectations, as well as finding a brilliant group of friends along the way.' She paused, feeling a slight lump in her throat. 'I think we should just see where life takes us and _then_ make plans. We'll keep in contact with some people and fall out of touch with others, but the important thing is that we shared this together; that we were here. _That's_ what I want to remember ten years down the line.' She fell silent, watching as people nodded assent around the circle and hoping that nobody had taken offence. However, it seemed nobody had and soon enough the conversation started up again.

Later, as Noah drove her home, he took one of her hands in his, twining their fingers together. 'I liked what you said earlier', he told her.

'Really? I thought it sounded kinda harsh.' He shrugged.

'I don't think so. I think it sounded...realistic. And sweet. You're right: I want to hold on to _these_ memories, not spoil them with some lame-ass reunion in years to come when nobody talks anymore.'

'Will _we_ still be talking?' Rachel asked in a very small voice, fear suddenly seizing her.

He pulled off the road, turning to look at her and planting a kiss on her lips. 'Of course we will Rach', he said with a smile. 'Worlds couldn't keep us apart.' Then, still holding her hand, he drove back on to the road and took her home.


End file.
